Where's My Piranha?

 

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PIRANHA-1972-Art (TV actor Tom Simcox) & Terry (Ahna Capri; had a role in ENTER THE DRAGON the next year), brother and sister photographers go to the Amazon with an American guide Pendrake (Peter Brown). She doesn't like guns even after Pendrake saves her life killing an attacking snake. After riding around and semi-exploring they meet a guy named Caribe (William Smith) at a bar. For some reason, Brown challenges Caribe to a motorcycle race. This takes up a good portion of the movie and still no PIRANHA! Then they all go to a diamond mine. Then an endless scene of people panning for gold. Then a sloth climbs a tree. We learn a lot about the characters background but not much about piranha. Not much happens until Caribe shows his true colors and rapes Terry. The killer fish do make an appearance in the finale. 

AKA “Piranha, Piranha”, it was filmed in Venezuela by someone named Bill Gibson. Smith and Brown had co-starred together on the “Laredo” TV series and had been in CROME AND HOT LEATHER the year before.

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Shatner & Spiders

 

KINGDOM OF THE SPIDERS-1977-Rancher Colby (Woody Strode) has sick cattle. His prize calf dies. Dr. Rack Hansen (William Shatner) takes some blood samples. Entomologist Diane Ashley (Tiffany Bolling) says the calf died of a spider bite. After Colby’s dog is found dead, he and his wife (Altovise Davis) show Rack & Diane a huge mound made by the spiders. They burn the mound but that doesn't seem to make the ants go away. While Rack & Diane are out horseback riding with his niece, Linda (Natasha Ryan), Colby is killed by the spiders. The mayor (Roy Engel) decides to crop dust the area with a deadly poison but the spiders make the plane crash. Linda's mom is also done in by the arachnids. Soon they are all over town and mass hysteria takes over. The survivors hole up in a cabin, where the next day seemingly forgotten by the outside world, the entire valley is one giant spider web. Also with Hoke Howell. 

Former actor John “Bud” Cardos (THE DARK (1979) directed this pretty decent low budget horror movie that's fairly creepy at times (especially the final scene). For years there was talk of a sequel form various sources but nothing ever panned out.

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Silent Western

 

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THE INVADERS-1912-Ancient western about a broken treaty between ranchers and the Sioux. Sometimes considered the “first great western”, its typical cowboys vs. Indians plot was probably pretty new in 1912. Star Francis Ford (younger brother John) co-directed it with Thomas Ince. Ford directed many short silent films and also acted into the 1950's.

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Mabuse Is Back

 

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THE TESTAMENT OF DR. MABUSE-1933-A counterfeit calls Capt. Lohman (Jim Gerald) to tell him he knows who's behind the ring but he goes insane before he can say who the leader is. Then a college professor gives a lecture on the history of the evil mastermind Dr. Mabuse, who's now in an insane asylum scribbling incoherent notes. 

Lehman investigates. At the asylum the man in charge sees an apparition while visiting Mabuse (Rudolph Klein-Rogge). Later, his assistant suggests that the doctor may not be crazy and using hypnotism to commit crimes. On his way to the police, he's killed. There's also Lilli (Monique Rolland) & Tom (Gustav Diessl) who are lovers. But ex-con Tom is torn between his love for Lilli and his criminal activities. When Mabuse dies, it seems his plans are still being carried out. Is he really dead? 

This followed Lang's first Mabuse movie DR. MABUSE, THE GAMBLER (1922), a gigantic 4 hour epic that had to be shown in 2 parts! It wouldn't be until 1960, 27 years later, that Lang would return with another sequel. The Mabuse character was created by German author Norbert Jacques in 1921.

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Creepy Hand

 

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THE CRAWLING HAND-1963-Mel Lockhart (Ashley Cowan), an astronaut coming back from the moon, seems to crack up and turns ghoul like. Steve Curan (Peter Breck) is in charge of the project and Allison Hayes (in her last movie role) is his kind of secretary. 

After the ship is deliberately blown up, Doc Weitzberg (Kent Taylor) thinks there's some kind of new organism being created. While rollicking on the beach with his gf, Marta (former Miss Iceland, Sirry Steffen), a guy named Paul (Rod Lauren) finds the severed arm of the astronaut. He wraps it up and takes it to his rooming house where it kills his landlady Mrs. Hotchkiss (Arline Judge in her last role). The sheriff (Alan Hale) and deputy (Ross Elliot) investigate. Paul is attacked by the hand but he doesn't killed. The hand seems to possess him. He acts strange and almost kills a restaurant owner (Syd Saylor in his last role). The hand slithers around. Occasionally, “The Bird's The Word” by The Rivingtons is heard. Also with Tristram Coffin and Richard Arlen. 

This cheapy sf horror was produced by Joe Robertson who served the same capacity on THE SLIME PEOPLE (1963) and AGENT FROM HARM (1964). He later got into porno films and wrote and directed 2 movies featuring Ed Wood,Jr., LOVE FEAST (1969) and MRS. STONE'S THING (1970). 

Noted “film doctor” Herbert L. Strock (HOW TO MAKE A MONSTER (1958)) directed. One of the screenwriters Joe Cranston, who later wrote THE CORPSE GRINDERS for Ted V. Mikels, was the father of actor Bryan Cranston. Co-star Rod Lauren had a brief musical career, made a few movie and TV appearances and later married a Philippine singing star. He in 2001 he was suspected of her stabbing murder. He fled to the US and committed suicide in 2007.

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Hope This Won't Be Me On Sunday!

 

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FROZEN ALIVE-1964-2 scientists Dr. Frank Overton (American actor Mark Stevens; once a contract actor at Warner Bros.) and Dr. Helen Wieland (German actress Marianne Koch; also in FISTFUL OF DOLLARS the same year) are doing research on suspended animation. After they win a special scientist award, the director Sir Keith (Walter Rilla; Dr. Mabuse' in several movies around this time) wants to break them up. When Frank wants his floozy, cheating wife, Joan (Delphi Lawrence) to retire and raise a family she refuses. Later, she gets drunk and insults Helen. Frank decides he'll use himself as a human experiment. While Frank and Helen are making preparations, elsewhere, Joan accidentally kills herself with a gun she stole from her lover. A police detective (Wolfgang Lukschy) thinks her death and hubby's experiments are related. Sir Keith agrees, thinking it's Frank's attempt at an elaborate suicide. Believing Frank will be arrested for murder when he wakes up, Helen decides to let him die. But then word arrives that Frank is innocent! She manages to correct her mistake and saves him. Everyone lives happily ever after. 

This low budget, un-thrilling West German/UK production was directed by Bernard Knowles who worked on several different UK television shows (“Col. March of Scotland Yard”, “Ivanhoe”). He made a few other feature films like SPACEFLIGHT IC-1(1965). He was also a cinematographer shooting many of Alfred Hitchcock's English films.

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Musical Carradine

 

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DOWN MISSOURI WAY-1946-Innocuous, low budget musical about a professor of agriculture (Martha O'Driscoll; HOUSE OF DRACULA the year before) and her educated mule (Shirley playing herself) and a film company using her land for a production. Mostly forgettable except for John Carradine as Thorny Dunning, the movie within a movie's director giving a deliberately hammy performance (he seems to be channeling John Barrymore). The professor and the movie's producer Burton (William Wright) fall in love. Singing star Gloria (Renee Godfrey) is jealous. 

The songs seem abnormally long in PRC production directed by Josef Berne and produced by Sam Sherman. Also with Roscoe Karns, Will Wright and Eddie Craven. Now forgotten leading man Wright was once touted as “World War 2's answer to Clark Gable”.

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