Angry & Red For A Good Reason!

MARS NEEDS WOMEN-Azalea Pictures (AIP-TV)-1967 - In the early ‘60’s, AIP decided to remake some of their classic low budget sci-fi/horror films of the ‘50’s and release them directly to TV! Who knows why?



They hired Larry Buchanan to direct them all. Besides the remakes he made two “original” productions. Both starred ex-Disney star Tommy Kirk. One was IT’S ALIVE (not the Larry Cohen film) about a prehistoric monster (with a visible zipper) in a cave, although I’ve read that it bares more than a passing resemblance to a short story by Richard Matheson!



And then there’s this..... thing. Really nothing much happens to justify such a cool title. Visitors from the Red Planet (led by Kirk as Dop) are having trouble with their Y (or X I forget) genetic code. Consequently, there have been few female births. The team needs healthy, unmarried Earth women of childbearing years to accompany them back to their home-world and reproduce! Naturally, The US (and the rest of the world) will have none of it and call the invaders “the world’s first common enemy”.



Kirk/Dop and cohorts shed their doofy space suits, dress like humans and hunt for fertile females. They target a stripper, stewardess and College Bowl beauty queen. Future Batgirl Yvonne Craig co-stars as Dr. Bolen, a brainy scientist in horn rimmed glasses who falls for Dop. The Martian would be kidnappers have funny suits with weird headgear and the hotheaded Colonel Page (Byron Lord) is hilarious, but it’s basically just talk, stock footage and walking.



The punk band Sloppy Seconds on their first album “Destroyed” use dialogue excerpts from MNW on the song “Running From The CIA”.



Some dialogue is funny (Buchanan also wrote the screenplay) :

Newscaster: There is no panic, just paralysis.



Dop: Remember sizes must be exact. From shoes to ties. Follow carefully the conversion charts between Mars and the Earth planet.



Martian: These ties serve no functional purpose. Red planet abandoned the use of ties fifty years ago as useless male vanity. It simply reveals the environmental naiveté of the earthmen.



Dr. Bolan: When was the last time you took a pretty girl for a walk? I mean, a pretty girl with a PHD.



Dop: What I have to say is for your ears only. The word love went out of our vocabulary 100 years ago.



Sure, Mars Needs Women but MARS NEEDS WOMEN needs more action!


"Got any women you can spare?"
                                               

"The past is prophetic in that it asserts loudly that wars are poor chisels for carving out peaceful tomorrows."-Martin Luther King Jr.


Thanks for reading!