The Way!

THE WARRIOR'S WAY-2010-In this surreal Martial Arts Western fable, Yang (Dong-gun Jang), a sword wielding assassin from Korea (with a baby) comes to the US and settles in a western town populated by circus performers including a clown, a bearded lady, a little person (Tony Cox) and a drunk (Geoffrey Rush who also narrates). He gets a job doing laundry and helps knife thrower Kate Bosworth hone her craft. They both have unhappy flashbacks. When the town is visited by The Colonel (Danny Huston), a ruthless killer with a mask, Yang is forced to reveal himself and help the townsfolk battle him and his army.

Yang gets help from Rush's character who it turns out is actually a famous bank robbing gunslinger who gave up killing...until now. The all out climax is great with several excellent fight scenes.

The assassins who are after Yang kind of remind me of the ring wraiths in THE LORD OF THE RINGS series but then one of TWW's producers Barrie Osborne also produced the LORD OF THE RINGS series!

Lung Ti (also in John Woo's A BETTER TOMORROW) is Yang's former mentor. It was written and directed in Auckland New Zealand by first time director Sngmoo Lee, a Korean who studied at NYU. It did poorly at the box office but don't let that stop you from enjoying it!

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Boo!

THE BOOGENS-1981-Some construction workers accidentally release the title creatures while exploring and dynamiting a mine in Utah. They look like giant shell-less turtles with tentacles but are only seen fully toward the end of the story. Rebecca Balding (from THE SILENT SCREAM) and Fred McCarren (who was in XANADU the year before) star. There's a couple of bloody deaths but there's a long spell of character development and no action like many horror films churned out in the early '80's. Familiar TV character actor Jon Lormer is an old man who knows where "the boogens" came from. It seems every character but the two leads die.

Director James L. Conway made many Sunn Classics pseudo-documentaries like IN SEARCH OF NOAH'S ARK, THE LINCOLN CONSPIRACY and BEYOND AND BACK. He made the UFO themed HANGAR 18 in 1980. After THE BOOGENS he in went into TV.

RIP: Hideki Irabu: 1969-2011.

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The Wacky '80's

GHOULIES-1985-A young man named Jonathan (overacting Peter Liapis) who as a baby was saved from being a demonic sacrifice inherits an old mansion and moves there with his girlfriend (Lisa Pelikan). During a party with his drunken stupid friends (one is Mariska Hargity in her movie debut) he begins to practice the black arts eventually conjuring up the little nasty demons of the title. His eyes glow green and he gets help from two little people Grizzel and Greedigut (who provide comedy relief). He throws another party and during another ritual makes his ghoul faced father (Michael Des Barres) rise from the grave. The ghoulies then kill his friends (one pops out of a toilet bowl like in the poster) and Jonathan must fight his demon dad.

Jack Nance (ERASERHEAD) plays a good guy sorcerer/caretaker who saves the day. Bobbi Bresee (MAUSOLEUM) has one scene.

This possession-sorcery nonsense was obviously inspired by Joe Dante's GREMLINS (made the year before) but I've read it went through several plot and script changes before being filmed. In a way the little monsters do seem like an afterthought. But it spawned 4 sequels!

Charles Band was the executive producer. It was the first movie directed by actor Luca Bercovici who later made ROCKULA and THE GRANNY.

Lead Liapis later played the same character in Part 4. England born Des Barres fronted the '70's rock band Detective and did a lot of American television. As a teen in his native England he'd already been in TO SIR WITH LOVE and I MONSTER.

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Corman Strikes Again!

THE WASP WOMAN-1959-Cosmetics CEO Janice Starlin (Susan Cabot with old age make-up) is worried her company is going down the tubes but she's more concerned about getting old.

She hires a scientist (Michael Mark) who's experiments with queen wasps produce a formula that makes her young. Unfortunately the treatment has some unwanted side effects. She turns into a hairy bug eyed insect with claws that prays on humans!

Barboura Morris is her secretary and Fred (later Anthony) Eisley is on her staff. They become suspicious when their pipe smoking colleague (William Roderick) becomes the first victim. Bruno VeSota plays a night watch man victim.

This THE FLY inspired horror is a very short and fast paced. It almost seems like an episode of a TV anthology show! Producer/director Roger Corman (who appears briefly as a doctor) made it between BUCKET OF BLOOD and SKI PATROL. It was written by actor Leo Gordon whose wife Lynn Cartwright appears as a switch board operator.

Both Cabot and Morris had appeared in Corman's SORORITY GIRL in 1957. Morris (who appeared in other Corman and /or AIP films) died of a stroke at 43 in 1975. Cabot (in 5 Corman directed features) was killed by her son in 1985. She was 59. WASP WOMAN was her last feature.

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Rock and Religion

THE WORLD’S GREATEST SINNER-1962-Rock god or sinner? Bored insurance salesman Clarence Hilliard (Timothy Carey) quits his job to write a book. That doesn’t work out so after seeing a rock band perform (the musician looks like he’s 12 years old) he decides to start his own group and throw some bible thumping in besides. He stands on street corners with his faithful friend Alonzo (Gil Barreto) and gets some followers (one of them is Titus Moede, later in some Ray Dennis Steckler movies).

He forms a kind of cabal with a bunch of nitwits to devise a plan (“Let’s be different. Let’s not hate anybody”). He seduces an old lady for money then dons a phony goatee and plays some numbers with his band (it’s very noisy) and shakes and yells like he’s having a fit. He preaches a loony kind of Nietzsche like philosophy that man is the only god and his followers run riot in the town. After his followers start calling him “God” the devil (who also narrates) visits him and convinces him to enter politics (“Just get rid of your guitar, Clarence”). He starts “The Eternal Man’s Party” and a montage of scenes depict how he’s corrupted by sex and power while campaigning as “God” Hilliard. After he loses the election it all goes down the drain and he cracks up, loses his family and blasphemes God. In the finale the devil as a snake is super-imposed around his body and the screen turns red negative!

For years I read all sorts of stuff about this movie. Michael Wheldon of “Psychotronic Video” fame gushed over it many times. It is entertaining. If more people get to see it (TCM showed one night at 2 AM) it could become the PLAN 9 of the21^st Century! Star Carey (a familiar and weird character actor who had scenes in the bigger budgeted films HOUSE OF NUMBERS and CONVICTS 4 the same year) wrote, produced and directed. It’s badly edited and some of the acting is quite funny. In his scenes before he becomes “God” Carey seems like he’s drunk. Paul Frees is the voice of Satan.

Frank Zappa wrote and performed the theme song and some incidental music is also obviously his (some of it sounds like his “Holiday In Berlin”, a theme he used many times over).

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3 By Franco

Filmmaker Jess Franco is a prolific, enigmatic director. If you think Woody Allen and Robert Altman made a lot of movies, well Franco leaves them both in the dust.

At his peak in the ‘60’s and ‘70’s his most exploitative films usually feature murder, blood, a wild jazz score, nudity and many of the same cast members. Occasionally he’s gotten some name stars to appear in his films.

In 1962 he created a horror character called Dr. Orloff who would reappear in many future films. Even Orloff’s servant Morpho showed up in other films (at least in name)! But his films suffered from low budgets, rushed filming, bad dubbing, censors and Franco’s insistent use of zoom senses. He used numerous pseudonyms and several versions of one movie were sometimes released for different countries! Some sources claim hardcore sex scenes were even added to some versions! Much of his output seemed obsessed with The Dracula Legend (and vampires in general), sadomasochism and lesbian love scenes. He’s still going strong today making films with names like KILLER BARBYS VS. DRACULA and BAD DAY AT THE CEMETERY but his output has decreased considerably. The following three movies were all made around the same time in 1971. This was the year after Franco made a fairly competent version of DRACULA and the imfamous EUNGENIE...AND THE STORY OF HER JOURNEY INTO PERVERSION.



SHE KILLED IN ECSTASY-1971-A scientist working with hormones and embryos (it almost sounds like stem cell research!) is rejected by 4 of his colleagues. He can’t accept the rejection and goes crazy, eventually committing suicide. His wife (Franco regular Soledad Miranda) takes revenge. She seduces the three men (Howard Vernon, Paul Muller and director Franco himself) then stabs and castrates them. The fourth is a woman who she also seduces then suffocates with a pillow. Later she drives off a cliff with her dead hubby beside her. The story isn’t much but this is a Jess Franco movie so there’s a loud jazz score to keep you interested and everyone wears bright clothing.



VAMPYROS LESBOS-1971 –This is the cult movie Franco made around the same time as SKIE and it seems to have the same musical score. Nadine, the daughter of Dracula (Soledad Miranda again) sets her sights on Linda who seeks the help of Dr. Seward (Franco regular Dennis Price) because she thinks it’s all a dream. Nadine and another woman do a nude erotic dance twice. The nude scenes of Nadine and Linda probably caused a stir at the time but I’m not sure if this was even released in the US in 1971 ! Paul Mueller and Franco are also in it.


THE DEVIL CAME TO ALAKASA-1971-This is a more typical Franco mess…er…movie. A scientist and his wife have a legendary stone that among other things can kill people exposed to it. Fred Williams (Jonathan Harker in Franco's production of DRACULA the year before) plays a Scotland Yard detective who investigates. He’s aided by another agent (Franco) and eventually helps and falls in love with an undercover government agent (Miranda) who’s posing as a stripper.

Meanwhile, a wheelchair bound Lord (Walter Rilla) and his mysterious servant (Howard Vernon) lurk in the background. Lots of people are killed in the confused plot that is hampered by bad dubbing and editing. Also the characters do and say things that I wasn’t really sure were intentional humor or not! Miranda was killed in a car accident soon after this was completed (maybe before as the ending seems tacked on).

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Don't Look At Me When You See The Title!

OLDBOY-2003-A man is mysteriously held captive in a room for 15 years. When he’s finally released he tries to find out why. This violent and sometimes annoying film uses a lot of craziness to explain it’s final resolution. I didn’t like it but some folks seem to. The Virginia Tech killer is said to have posted photos of himself online that resemble scenes from this movie.

South Korean director Chan-wook Park also made SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE which I liked better.

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Happy Sunday!

CAVITE-2005-This Philippines based film was filmed on a low budget using mostly hand held shots. It’s been touted as little masterpiece by some but I thought it was very over rated, drawn out and lacking a reasonable resolution.

Adam (Ian Gamazon also the co-director, co-writer, producer and editor) is a Philippine born security guard living in the US. He returns to his homeland because of a family crisis. It turns out to be a hell of a crisis he didn’t expect. His mother and sister are being held hostage by Muslim terrorists who threaten to kill them if Adam doesn’t follow their precise directions. It’s rather suspenseful and mysterious for a while but then it peters out. The ending seems to justify the terrorists’ action.

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Fungus Among Us!

SPACE MASTER-X-7-1958-A scientist with marital problems (Paul Frees, better know for this vocal narrations than his on screen acting) gets some “space fungus” off a US probe (The Space Master) and brings it home to experiment on. Unfortunately while he’s doing this he keeps getting interrupted by his ex-wife (Lyn Thomas) who wants custody of their child. Eventually the fungus kills him and escapes but the government seems to contain it until they learn the wife had been in the house too. Bill Williams (who was in a TV series DATE WITH THE ANGELS at the time) is in charge of finding her.

Along the way he meets Moe Howard playing a helpful cab driver (“Ya know she had eyebrows like you pull out with pliers”) and Thomas B. Henry is a professor.

It's like a low budget science fiction version of Elia Kazan's PANIC IN THE STREETS in a way because once the fungus is contained it's really just a hunt for the infected woman. I thought the story could have been better since the screenwriters were George Worthington Yates (EARTH VS. THE FLYING SAUCERS, THEM!) and Daniel Mainwaring (INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS).

Director Edward Bernds made many 3 Stooges shorts (and later acouple of the "new" Stooges movies), the underrated Sci-Fi WORLD WITHOUT END and Bowery Boys comedies. He died in 2000 at 94!

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Space Bugs

STARSHIP TROOPERS-1997-In the future high school kids are encouraged through lots of advertising to join the military to fight insect like aliens from a far off planet. Johnny (Casper Van Dien) joins the corps mainly because his girlfriend Carmen (Denise Richards) has to. Unfortunately she takes up with another dweeb (Patrick Muldoon). Dina Meyer is Dizzy, another recruit who is sweet on Johnny. There's a lot of cardboard acting and clichéd situations but things pick up when Earth goes to war against "the bugs". 

Michael Ironside is the commanding officier and Jake Busey, Neil Patrick Harris and Clancy Brown are in it. Director Paul Verhoven made this after the alughable SHOW GIRLS. It's based on a novel by Robert Heinlein.

It seems this story is ripe for a remake!

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Bad..James Bad

QUANTUM OF SOLACE-2008-This is the second of the "new" James Bond films and takes up soon after the last one. Daniel Craig returns as the blond haired 007, a violent, no nonsense killing machine who although on the side of good mostly seems like some out of control cyborg from a Jeff Wincott video.

Judi Dench once again plays M, looking a lot less like she's smelling some foul odor than she did in previous outings and leading lady Olga Kurylenko (CENTURION) is pretty forgettable.

Bond is out to avenge the death of his lover from CASINO ROYALE but winds up getting involved with a guy who wants to help a dictator regain power in Bolivia so he can buy up the water rights! Though this is action packed it's ultimately a little disappointing. For one the filmmakers take several shots at the US especially that they are turning a blind eye to the events going on because they want oil. This coming from the country that let the Lockerbie bomber out of jail so it could get an oil deal from Libya?! Two, though Jeffery Wright returns a Felix Leiter, he's more or less a stooge/wimp and most importantly number three: What has happened to the Bond villains?

Toward the end of the Roger Moore series there seemed to be a deliberate shift away from a super villain type bad guy to some ordinary sneering known it all. Once there was Goldfinger, Dr. No, hell even Jaws but at least it was something. In this one we get Mathieu Almaric (THE DIVING BELL AND THE BUTTERFLY) as some bug eyed wimpy whiner who somehow almost manages to beat Bond in the climax with an axe!

Giancarlo Giannini returns from the last film also. The one woman Bond has sex with in this film winds up killed with fuel oil in a nod to GOLDFINGER. The end credits only say "James Bond Will Return". Director Marc Forster had made MONSTER'S BALL and FINDING NEVERLAND.

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Dark and Stormy Crap

DARK STORM-2006-Boring Canadian production involves a secret government project working with dark matter. Two scientists (pudgy Stephen Baldwin and Rob LaBelle) head the project and Baldwin's character becomes electronically charged and there's a lot of talk. The X-Files' William B. Davis is a general who wants to close the project down. The project head is a traitor and dark matter threatens to destroy the world. Director Jason Bourque made shorts and worked in TV before this. I would have had a better time eating Canadian bacon raw than watching this.

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Early Hammer

X-THE UNKNOWN-1956-This early Hammer production is a sequel to the previous year's THE QUARTERMASS XPERIMENT (known as ENEMY FROM SPACE in the US). Like it's predecessor it also stars an American actor in the lead role. While doing radiation exploration in Scotland, the British army discovers a "bottomless hole" from which an unseen entity has emerged. Later on, the being which survives on energy roams various locales burning victims with radiation. Dean Jagger is Dr. Royston, a brilliant scientist trying to figure out what the X is. Leo McKern is an energy inspector who helps Royston out. Edward Chapman is Royston's pompous director. Anthony Newley and future MONTY PYTHON director Ian MacNaughton are army guard victims. The monster is a big (animated) blob. The climax involves the detonation of a cobalt bomb. Also with Michael Ripper, Williams Lucas and Frazier Hines.

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I Saw Insidious

INSIDIOUS-2010-This is just a POLTERGEIST/THE EXORCIST/AMITYVILLE HORROR rip-off that critics made a big about because the director of SAW, James Wan made it.

A family seems to be terrorized in their house by some unknown force after their young son goes into a coma He's really possessed by a demon in a place called "the further" and the further I go with this review the further I can think of bad things to say about this derivative nonsense. I've read comments calling it the scariest horror movie ever but it's just talky shit with some loud noises thrown in. Parts of it, especially when 3 psychic researchers appear seem unintentionally funny.

I will give director Wan credit though. He tries using suspense and shock rather than the usual blood and gore associated with most modern horror films. Maybe I'm just a jaded old foggie but for me it didn’t live up to it’s hype!

Patrick Wilson and Rose Byrne are the parents and Barbara Hershey (apparently with a new face) is his mother. Lin Shaye is the main psychic and screenwriter Leigh Whannell has a role.

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AKA: Horror on Snape Island

TOWER OF EVIL-1972-A stodgy group of English paleontologists go to the mysterious Snape Island to investigate when a Phoenician sword is found after a woman seems to have gone insane and murdered her 3 friends there. A private investigator (Bryant Haliday) goes along too because he doesn’t believe the woman was really insane. Jill Haworth (also in the English made HORROR HOUSE and THE MUTATIONS) co-stars. There’s a lot of talk and bickering about sex and infidelity. The film features an unusual amount of nudity and gore for the time (including a severed head rolling across the floor).

Although star Haliday was a well known London stage actor at the time, he only made 6 movie appearances including DEVIL DOLL, CURSE OF THE VOODOO and THE PROJECTED MAN. He died in Paris in 1996.

Director Jim O'Connolly had made BERSERK (with Joan Crawford) and VALLEY OF THE GWANGI (with Ray Harryhausen SFX) previously.

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3 Quickies. It's a Busy Weekend!

CINDERELLA-2006-This is not based on the famous fairy tale that features evil step sisters. This is a Korean made sort of horror film about a girl named Hyunsu who’s mother is a plastic surgeon. She does cosmetic surgery on some of her friends who eventually wind up dead. It has some good effects but overall the plot is confusing and the ending is a disappointment.



A DIRTY CARNIVAL-2006-This is an very well made Scorese’ influenced South Korean gangster film. Byung-doo is a low level mobster who seems more like a doormat than a thug but after murdering a lawyer for a his boss he slowly and viciously gains more power and becomes more ruthless. His childhood friend who is now a filmmaker uses Byung’s knowledge to make his own gangster film and this causes problems. There’s several violent fights but it was a little too long for me.



THE TALL T-1957-Randolph Scott is a loner cowboy who runs up against outlaw Richard Boone and his two goons (Skip Homeier & Henry Silva) when hitching a stage coach ride with some newlyweds (Maureen O’Sullivan & John Hubbard). This is the second of seven “adult” westerns Scott made with director Budd Boetticher from 1956-1960. It’s psychological, violent and very cool! Arthur Hunnicutt is a doomed stage driver. Burt Kennedy wrote the script based on a story by Elmore Leonard.

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