Snake Bit

 

 

SNAKE EATER-1989-Some undercover cop called Soldier (Lorenzo Lamas) is after revenge on some redneck hillbillies led by the crazed Junior (Robert Scott) who murdered his parents and kidnapped his sister. King (singer Ronnie Hawkins), a guy who rents out boats, converts Soldier's motorcycle into watercycle and he goes into the forest to find the gang. King's daughter kind of gets in the way. A scene at the end with the whiny nerd (Ron Palillo from TV's “Welcome Back Kotter”) seems tacked on. Former pro football player Larry Csonka is a cop. 

It spawned three sequels though Gary Daniels played the lead in part 4. Besides, the first two sequels director George Erschbamer later directed episodes of The New Addams Family TV Show in 1998.

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Chan

 

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CRIME STORY-1993-A police inspector Eddie Chan (Jackie Chan), who may be suffering post trauma, becomes involved in the kidnapping of a real estate magnate (Kar-Ling Law) and his ailing wife (Auyeung Pui San), planned by Detective Hung (Kent Cheng), a corrupt cop. There are some incredible stunts and sfx, especially in the finale but this is much more serious than Chan's usual serio-comedy outings. Directed by Kirk Wong (with an assist by Chan).

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Sherlock Is Back!

 

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SHERLOCK HOLMES AND THE SECRET WEAPON1942-Sherlock Holmes (Basil Rathbone) smuggles bomb inventor Dr. Toben (William Post Jr.) out of Nazi occupied France. Once safe at 221 Baker Street, the ingrate sneaks out to see a girlfriend and give her a letter. On the way back, he's attacked. He survives and the next day there is a demonstration of his new aerial bomb. For some reason he doesn't want to divulge the secret and gives 4 parts to 4 different scientists (one is played by Henry Victor). Later Holmes deduces that Prof. Moriarty (Lionel Atwill) has kidnapped Toben. Holmes adopts several disguises in this modern WW 2 propaganda mystery and has a weird haircut. It marks the first appearance of Inspector Lestrade (Dennis Hoey) who isn't as pompous as in later films. 

Of course, Nigel Bruce is back as Dr. Watson as is Mary Gordon as Mrs. Hudson. There are unbilled appearances by Rudolph Anders, Whit Bissell, Veda Ann Borg, Paul Bryar, Harry Cording, James Craven, Paul Fix and Michael Mark. 

This is the first Holmes adventure directed by Roy William Neil, who'd go on to produce and direct the rest of the series.

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Pre-Wolfman Lon

 

 (imdb)

A SCREAM IN THE NIGHT-1935-Jack Wilson (Lon Chaney Jr.) is in Singapore planning on arresting thief Johnny Fly (Manuel Lopez) with the help of local guy Wu Ting (Phillip Ahn). He meets old friend Edith (Shelia Terry) and her Uncle Joe (John Ince), who subsequently becomes a victim of Fly and is robbed. Fortunately, the robbers don't get his most valuable ruby, so Wilson and Inspector Green (Richard Cramer) expect Fly to strike again. Wu Ting goes undercover as a peddler but is killed by Butch Curtain (also played by Chaney), one eyed henchman to Fly and his moll, Mora (Zara Tazil). Fly finally gets the ruby by kidnapping Edith. Of course, Mora is jealous of her. Meanwhile, Jack arrests Butch and impersonates him. After a lot of static talk and some fights, good triumphs over evil. 

This musty low budget Astor production has some too dark scenes and bad acting but Chaney is good taking a page out of dad's playbook playing the dual role. It seems this wasn't released until 1943 when Lon had hit the big time. It's one of his 6 movies appearances in 1935.

 Co-Star Richard Cramer made over 200 movie appearances (he's in the WC Fields short A FATAL GLASS OF BEER) but may be more to familiar to some having menaced Laurel & Hardy in several films. John Ince, brother of the ill-fated Thomas, was a director during the silent era. Female lead Shelia Terry left the motion pictures by 1938. She committed suicide in 1957. Director Fred C. Newmeyer (also an actor) made SAFETY LAST! with Harold Lloyd and “Our Gang” shorts.

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Hunter

 

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THE GOLDEN ARROW-1962-Hassan (Tab Hunter with a dubbed in voice) leads a band that kidnaps Jamila (Rossana Podesta; in HORROR CASTLE by the same director the next year), a princess and holds her for ransom. At night, he takes the ransom and the princess and makes his getaway. He abandons her in a market and is promptly arrested. 3 genies help him escape because he is actually the real sultan of Damascus. 

With a flying carpet, fire monsters and a serious story that switches to comedy whenever the genies show up. Low budget Italian “sword & sandal” production directed by Antonio Margheriti.

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Inaction?

 

 (imdb)

MOVIE IN ACTION-1987-An American film crew is making a war movie in Thailand. Out of nowhere,the leading lady Susan (Chantal Mansefield) is kidnapped by a gun toting gang of locals. When the authorities are slow to act, the director (Bo Swenson) decides he and his film crew should rescue her. After they rob the Thailand Army base, a few of them go to Cambodia to rescue Susan. The director seems to think they have a good chance of making it. I don't know why he'd think that. They all seem like a bunch of kooks. The group consists of the lead star (who kind of knows martial arts), the makeup woman, the sfx guy, cameraman and the soundman. There's a big ridiculous shootout at a remote army base and it's revealed the producer of their movie is behind all the shenanigans. 

Pretty outrageous senseless action drama. Director Teddy Lee also used the name Teddy Page as well as the names Ted Johnson, Teddy Chiu, Teddy Chuck and others.

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It Started Here!

 

 (imdb)

LA LLORONA-1933-In Mexico a man dies on the street after hearing a wailing voice. Then a doctor (Ramon Pereda) and his wife (Virginia Zuri) have a birthday party for their 4-year-old son. The doctor's father-in-law Don Fernando (Paco Martinez) is worried because his own son disappeared on his fourth birthday and was later found dead. Unbeknownst to them, a hooded figure is spying on them. Don Fernado tells the doctor the story of how La Llorona, "the crying woman" came to be, set in " New Spain". After this rather long flashback, in the present the hooded figure kills Fernando and tries to steal the son but is unsuccessful. The police are called in. Another flashback and the hooded culprit is revealed. 

This slow moving, talky Mexican horror tale was the first to use the legendary La Llorona which later was featured in several horror films. It was directed by Ramon Peon.

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Castle!

 

 (imdb)

MACABRE-1958-Most people in town don't like Dr. Rodney Barrett (George Prince) because they believe he's indirectly responsible for the death of a blind woman Nancy. Sleazy police chief Tyloe (Jim Backus) tells him to leave town. Only his nurse Polly (Jacqueline Scott), his girlfriend Sylvia (Susan Morrow) and his housekeeper Miss Kushins (Ellen Corby) seem to like him. Then someone kidnaps his daughter and says she's been buried alive. Mr. Wetherby (Phillip Tonge), Nancy's ailing father joins them in the hunt. Flashbacks reveal that Nancy (Christine White) was kind of a slut who got pregnant from an affair with the sheriff or her chauffeur (unbilled Robert Colbert). But Dr. Barrett is hiding a secret too. 

Not half bad, if strange, murder mystery directed by the one and only William Castle.

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Ed Wood: Adviser

 

 (bleeding skull)

THE ASTOUNDING SHE MONSTER-1957-Wealthy socialite Margaret Chaffee (Marilyn Harvey) is kidnapped and taken to a hideout in the San Gabriel mountains. A "visitor beyond imagination" lands on Earth around the same time the two kidnappers (one is Keene Duncan) along with their "moll" (Jeanne Tatum), a drunken floozy and Chaffee, hold up in the isolated cabin of a geologist (Robert Clarke). The rather voluptuous radioactive alien (Shirley Kilpatrick) walks around the forest, kills a dog and later a bear. She kills one kidnapper then terrorizes the rest who flee into the woods. They try to set her on fire but that fails. They run back to the cabin. They do this several times. 

This black and white cheapie was made by Ronnie Ashcroft who had been assistant director on Ed Wood's NIGHT OF THE GHOULS (which starred Duncan). It's said Wood was the movie's “adviser” and his influence is all over it. Loud out of place music, more talk than action, characters spouting quasi-philosophical dialogue. Soon after this Ashcroft produced the short “Trick Shooting with Keene Duncan”.

 “She Monster” Shirley Kilpatrick had a successful career as a model but her only movie after this was an un-uncredited role in THE GENE KRUPA STORY in 1959. After several troubled marriages, she became a psychic! Unfortunately, at age 38 she died of a drug overdose in 1971.

 

Shirley with Jack LaLane

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Against A Low Budget Sky

 

 (imdb)

AGAINST A CROOKED SKY-1975-A weird American Indian Temkai (Geoffrey Land from Al Adamson movies) kidnaps a young girl named Charlotte (Jewell Blanch). Her father (Clint Ritchie) goes to rescue her. Meanwhile his not too bright son Sam (Stuart Petersen) goes looking himself and after nearly drowning is rescued by a backwoods grump called Russian (Richard Boone). After a first aborted search, Sam and Russian search for the tribe that Temkai belongs to. Along the way they meet up with the rightful chief (Henry Wilcoxon who also provides narration) who was left to die in the desert years before. They find the strange tribe now run by an angry bald guy. Sam must go through a ritual to save his sister's life. 

This low budget politically incorrect “The Searchers” rip off is only worth seeing for Boone's performance. Director Earl Bellamy was a prolific TV director with few feature movie credits but he made WALKING TALL PART 2 the same year. Land was in JESSI'S GIRLS and BLAZING STEWARDESSES (both directed by Al Adamson) the same year. Co-star Blanch later became a country-western singer and song publisher.

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Tne Big House

 

(IMDB)

BIG HOUSE USA-1955-Jerry Barker (Ralph Meeker) botches the kidnapping of the son of a rich guy (Willis Bouchey) when the kid is killed escaping. Ranger Chief Erickson (Roy Roberts) and FBI agent Madden (Reed Hadley) arrest him but can only find him guilty of extortion. The warden (un-billed Stafford Repp) puts him in "the lion's den", a cell with 4 notorious criminals: Machine Gun Mason (William Talman), Benny Kelly (Charles Bronson), Alamo Smith (Lon Chaney) and Rollo LaMar (Broderick Crawford). Notoriously nicknamed "the Iceman" Barker becomes the most hated prisoner there. However his four cell mates are planning a prison break and LaMar wants Barker to go with them so he can get the un-recovered ransom money. They succeed in escaping but LaMar is too tough for his own good. 

This gritty little prison drama was the second feature directed by Howard Koch. He went on to direct stuff like UNTAMED YOUTH, BOP GIRL GOES CALYPSO and THE GIRL IN BLACK STOCKINGS (all in 1957). He also produced many low to medium budget films including horror films like THE BLACK SLEEP, VOODOO ISLAND, FRANKENSTEIN 1970 and THE PHARAOH'S CURSE. In the 1970's he produced several episodes of “The Annual Academy Awards TV Show”.

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Santo Against Mars

 

(IMDB)

SANTO VS. THE MARTIAN INVASION-1966-Martians hi-jack TV broadcasts in Mexico and their leader Argos (Wolf Ruvinskis) issues a warning that if Earth doesn't stop making nuclear power and can't live peacefully with one another they will be destroyed! Everyone thinks it's a joke. The Martians are dressed funny with big helmets on their heads. At a large outdoor sports arena where our hero El Santo (himself) is teaching some boys wrestling moves the aliens land a spaceship. A hench-Martian kills a bunch of spectators (including children) and he has a fight with Santo until he disappears and returns to the ship. Argos goes on TV again to announce that the reason they chose Mexico to land is that country doesn't have nuclear weapons. Yet Mexico has to suffer pointless deaths because they are already in compliance with the aliens demands? These Martians are loonies! 

Argos shows up at a professor's lab where Santo happens to be. Argos fails to convince them that his goals have merit. He and Santo have a brief fight but Argos weakens and disappears. He drops a pill he tried to shallow and later the Prof. discovers it allows the invaders to breath our air. The Martians kidnap some scientists but also random people (including kids). Some Mars maidens mesmerize some men and make two luchadors attack Santo. 

Mostly it's the Martians abducting people and the saint of lucha libre having various fights. A little too long for me. Wolf Ruvinskis came from Latvia to be a pro wrestling in Mexico and stayed on after his career ended. He created a wrestling super guy of his own, Neutron who appeared in a series of films. Veteran director Alfredo B. Crevana later made more El Santo adventures and other S.F. and horror films.

 (IMDB)

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Wild

 

THE WILD RIDE-1960-Wise ass speedster Johnny Varron (Jack Nicholson; the same year as LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS) runs a cop off the road. He and his "gang" like to play chicken. He's upset when his pal Dave (Robert Bean) goes "shallow" while “playing” and blames Dave's girlfriend Nancy (Georgiana Carter). Dave dumps her because Johnny says so but Dave has second thoughts and decides to step out on the gang. Johnny kind of kidnaps Nancy and tries to molest her but Dave catches them, freaks out and crashes his car and dies. Johnny takes the blame and surrenders to the police. His gang abandons him. "The stud's gone bad. Let's split". 

Roger Corman was the executive producer. The director Harvey Berman was a UCLA drama teacher. Much of the cast were amateurs. As for the dialogue, as Johnny's older lover says "Speak so I can understand you". There's also a re-cut version that makes the main story a flashback.

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Not The Famous Monster

THE ISLAND MONSTER-1954-Critics go on and on about how bad this movie is. True, it's boring and one of Karloff's worst. His real voice isn't even used. A bad imitator dubs him. 

06-13THE ISLAND MONSTER isn't very good. The story drags and the dubbing is terrible but the film was never meant to be viewed outside of Italian speaking countries. This wasn't that uncommon (it happened to Christopher Lee in the German made Sherlock Holmes and would again effect Karloff in THE SNAKE PEOPLE). In the mid-fifties Boris wasn't making a lot of movies. He concentrated his career on TV (he started the “Col. March” TV series the same year) and the stage. Still he felt if someone wanted him for a film he was usually willing to take it. And getting a free trip to Italy for his wife and himself couldn't hurt. He was also probably under the assumption that it wouldn't be shown outside of Italy. It wasn't a pleasant experience for him being the only English speaking cast member and he didn't like the fact that his character was totally unsympathetic in the end. Personally I was glad to see it when it showed up once on WOR’s “Fright Night” in NYC.

Mario (Renato Vicario), an undercover cop in Naples investigates the smuggling of heroin. He meets Guy Gaetano (King Karloff), the island’s “benefactor”, who has built a hospital for sick babies. He goes to a club where everyone acts suspiciously and he pretends to romance D'Auro (Franca Marzi), a singer there. Trouble of another kind brews when Mario's wife Fiorella and little daughter (and their dog) come to visit and wife sees Mario talking to D'Auro. She meets with a smuggler named Foster (Carlo Duse) because they are all in the dope ring and take their orders from an unseen boss (gee...I wonder who that is?). Foster wants the singer to kill Mario. I guess she refuses because later Fiorella is lured from her hotel room with a phony phone call and leaves their daughter alone in an unlocked room. The girl is kidnapped and taken to a secluded island. Of course later it's revealed Gaetano is the ring leader and is also the “monster” of the title, an evil guy who pushes dope and kidnaps a child. 

I guess the producers thought a movie with Karloff in it with monster in the title would deceive many film-goers into thinking it was some kind of horror movie. Eventually the daughter is rescued but not before D'Auro is shot. Mario kills Gaetano. From what some of the characters say it seems this drawn out potboiler was longer but scenes were edited out. Director Roberto Bianchi Montero went on to make many more films in his native country.

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The Lone Star State of Horror

PSYCHO FROM TEXAS-1975-A nutty redneck named Wheeler (John King lll) has flashbacks of his mom having sex. Meanwhile a local rich retired businessman  named Phillips (Herschal Mays), who fishes with an African American kid, plans the wedding of his daughter Connie (Candy Dee). Turns out Wheeler was hired to kidnap and rob Phillips. He and a local fool kidnap Phillips and after tying him up at a remote cabin, Wheeler goes to score some weed. Now he may be psycho but he's not very smart leaving the shit for brains local to watch over their captive. Sure enough while Wheeler is out making a pest of himself Phillips escapes. The local gives chase. They keep referring to Phillips as an “old man" but he takes off and their chase scene seems to go on forever!  Meanwhile Wheeler visits Connie and a neighbor informs her that her daddy is missing. (The kid he goes fishing with found his abandoned car) It seems Connie's fiance Steve (Reed Johnson) is behind the plot. The long long chase finally ends with Phillips stabbing the local ass in the neck. He eventually makes it to police headquarters.  After Wheeler kills Connie's friend, he gets some KFC and visits a bar. Steve is arrested but when he sees Phillips is alive he grabs a cop’s gun and bolts. Yes! Another chase scene! The chase is inter-cut with Wheeler's antics at the very darkly lit bar where he kills the only other customer and makes the bartender (Linnea Quigley) dance naked and pours beer on her (she looks like she's laughing on one point). A cop shoots Steve in the head, father and daughter are reunited and the sheriff (who’s daughter Wheeler killed) shoots Wheeler whose last words are “Don't hurt me, mama!”.  

This fairly boring slasher film began life as the never released WHEELER. It went through several changes and titles before it became PSYCHO FROM TEXAS. The bar scenes with  Linnea Quigley (this could be her first film role depending on when the scenes were shot) were added to this version providing the only actual highlight of the whole film. Seems like they put it toward the end to give at least some kind of payoff. Two directors are credited: Jack Collins (who plays the sheriff) and Jim Feazell.

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Vanishing Bride

THE CORPSE VANISHES-1942-Somebody is killing then kidnapping the corpses newlywed brides. 

A young headstrong reporter named Pat (Luana Walters) and her older comic photographer Sandy (Vince Barnett) try to investigate. It's all a fiendish plot by Dr. George Lorenz (Bela Lugosi) who extracts bodily fluid from the dead brides to keep his ungrateful wife, The Countess (Elizabeth Russell) young and vital. Dr. Foster (Tris Coffin) assists Lorenz in a cure for The Countess. Lorenz uses drugged orchids and gets help from “my little family” which includes little Toby (Angelo Rossitto), tough guy Mike (George Eldredge), housekeeper Fagah (Minerva Urecal; also in THE APE MAN with Bela) and her brutish son Angel (Frank Moran) who Lorenz whips. He and his wife also like to sleep in coffins. When Pat is forced to stay at the doc's place for the night she snoops around and sees Angel talking to a dead bride. When Foster sees Lorenz strangle Angel he decides to help Pat by setting up a phony marriage but instead Lorenz drugs and kidnaps her. Before he can make the lethal injection Fagah stabs him to death (he killed her son). When the Countess tries to make the injection Fagah stabs her too. 

This is a typical outrageous Monogram studios Lugosi melodrama with Bela being a pretty cruel guy. Luana Walters is good as the noisy wisecracking lead. Too bad she didn't get better roles. Wallace Fox directed Lugosi in THE BOWERY AFTER MIDNIGHT the same year. He also made several “East Side Kids” comedies. Later he made a bunch of westerns and went into TV. He died in 1958. Sam Katzman was the producer...

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More Badness

MANIAC ON THE LOOSE-2008-Stupid amateurish junk about an escaped mental patient. It's mostly talk with the nut ranting at two kidnapped victims. The twist is one of the victims is the escaped psycho while the kidnapper is just a random nut. I think it was suppose to be a comedy but the acting and dialogue is so inane it's hard to tell. Later after he kills the rando loony, the escaped patient has a party for his dead victims. 

The director of this junk Steve Hudgins seemed to think he was making some high art horror film with flashbacks and strange twists but it's just a waste of time.

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John Saxon In The UK

NIGHT CALLER FROM OUTER SPACE-1965-An object from space crashes in the English countryside. The army investigate along with scientists Dr. Morley (Maurice Denham) and Dr. Costain (American John Saxon playing a Brit for some reason). Although the object was supposed to be very big. All they find is cold orb.

Back in their lab the duo are assisted by cold, stuck up Anne Morrow (Patricia Haines) who Saxon unsuccessfully tries to seduce. While Morley and an army major (John Carson) in charge try to answer the PM’s pompous inquiries over the phone, Ann while typing her notes starts to get hot flashes. They seem to emanate from the room where the orb is kept. When she opens the door a weird hand grabs her arm. She breaks away and sounds an alarm but of course when the soldiers look around they find nothing. After they leave the orb starts glowing. The next day the Major has decided it’s all a prank. Costain finds a weird footprint in the dirt and believes Ann’s story. Morley dies while experimenting with orb after being menaced by an unseen creature. The army takes some shots at it. The Major is killed by a Jeep driven by the creature! Costain makes a connection that the creature may be responsible for the disappearance of several women. It seems all the missing women answered an ad placed in a magazine by a mysterious person named Mr. Madra. Costain figures out the creature has come from Ganymede, a moon of Jupiter. Scotland Yard superintendent Hartley (Alfred Burke) sets a trap with Ann answering one of the ads. She’s killed. Then Saxon, Hartley and the Police Commissioner set another trap where they learn Madra is a half scarred alien (Robert Crewdson) that needs “new blood” to help resurrect his race. He takes the women and goes back home. 

Director John Gilling made the much better THE PLAGUE OF THE ZOMBIES the next year. Despite its film noirish like setting it's bloody boring with a lot of scientific jive about nonsense. It's based on a novel by Frank Crisp. Also known as BLOOD BEAST FROM OUTER SPACE.

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Starman To The Rescue

ATTACK FROM SPACE-1957/1964-Once again the unique inhabitants of The Emerald Planet detect an alien threat to planet Earth which in turn could threaten them and the whole solar system, so they send Starman (once again Ken Utsui) to investigate. The Superians are out to conquer Earth and want a special motor Dr. Yama (Hiroshi Hayashi who had small roles in GODZILLA and SEVEN SAMURAI) and his colleagues are working on. The bad guys kidnap his kids so he'll cooperate. He refuses so they turn him and his kids into mindless slaves. Starman invades their supreme headquarters. Later after the aliens attack Earth several times, the professor's kids and his assistant (their mind control wears off) do some sabotage and Star shows up to shoot and thrown around the dumb aliens in a long fight scene. After beating up the leader he reunites the daughter with the others and they blow up the sinister satellite.

Third in the US edited series this is a mash up of the 5^th and 6^th Super Giant movies.

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Daring Drug Expose'

MARIHUANA-1936-More REEFER MADNESS influenced anti drug mania with two sleazy grass peddlers who recruit a woman (Harley Wood) to help them push weed after the boyfriend who impregnated her is killed in a drug smuggling operation. Later they kidnap her sister's child and hold her for ransom until she learns it's actually her child! Another badly acted morality tale from exploitation master Dwain Esper, the director of MANIAC and HOW TO UNDRESS IN FRONT OF YOUR HUSBAND.

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