
(imdb)
NIGHT
TRAIN TO TERROR-1985-On a train, a terrible rock band play. Also on
the train are God (un-billed Ferdy Mayne) and Satan (un-billed Tony
Giorgio) who discuss various things in this low budget trilogy.
In
the first story, “The Case of Harry Bilings”, an accident victim
named Harry (John Phillip Law) is turned into a weirdo who drugs
women and brings them to an institution where a big doofus intern
Otto (Richard Moll) rapes and dismembers them and sells their body
parts. Later a female doctor lobotomizes a male doctor. Harry
decapitates Otto and discovers the male doctor operating on the
female doctor. I thought this might have been a misfire black comedy
despite the subject matter.
Number
2: “The Case of Gretta Connors”. A musician named Greta (Merideth
Hayes) is turned into a porno actress by a jerk named George (J.
Martin Sellers). Glen, a preppie type sees one of Gretta's movies and
falls in love with her. Somehow, he meets her and they become lovers.
It turns out George is the head of “The Death Club” whose
members have all had brushes with death. Something called a
“Transinian Winged Beetle” (terrible animation) stings a guy to
death and his eyeballs explode. They also play an electrocution game
where an African American guy is burned to death. Later they play a
game of death with a construction ball that looks like something from
the '60's “Batman” TV show.
The
third story is called “The Case of Claire Hansen”, Mr. Weiss
(Marc Lawrence) enlists a police Lt. (Cameron Mitchell) and his
assistant Dieter (also Marc Lawrence) to help him trap a Nazi. Then
Weiss is killed by a fanged monster. Coroner Claire Hansen (Faith
Cliff) examines the body. Her husband Peter is the author of the book
“Is God Dead?”. A guy named Papini warns Peter the devil is
coming for him. The Nazi is now the still young Mr. Oliver (Robert
Bristol), a murderer sporting goat legs. The boyfriend of one of
Oliver's victims tries to kill him but is crushed by a red eyed
monster (terrible animation). Strange rubbery demons attack Claire
but it seems to be an illusion. A priest tells her she was picked by
God to battle the devil. He gives her a box and tells her to cut out
Oliver's heart and put it in the box. A badly animated monster kills
Papini. The Lt and Dieter are blown up. Then Oliver turns into a
demon (bad puppet) and kills Peter. Somehow Claire runs Oliver down
with her car and takes him to a hospital to remove his heart.
Everything goes awry in the bloody operating room finale but Satan
wins.
The band plays some more but fortunately are killed when the
train crashes. (but sadly, they seem to come back to life) This out of
whack z budget trilogy was actually made from three full length or
almost finished films and the third story actually was released in
full length form as CATACLYSM. Four directors are credited but the
screenwriting for all the stories go to one person, Phillip Yordan,
who once won an Oscar for the screenplay of BROKEN LANCE (1954)!
Thanks for reading!