No Fight

 

 (imdb)

LADY STREETFIGHTER-1980-This shit show starts off with a woman being tortured and killed. Then a woman named Linda (producer/screenwriter Renee Harmon) is set up to be a hit and run victim but she escapes. While talking to some asshole we learn the murdered woman was Linda's sister and she wants revenge on a gangster Max Diamond. Meanwhile, an FBI agent, Rick Pollard (Jody McCrea) watches a grotesque strip show featuring Liz Renay! At a party of criminals where men are dressed in togas, Linda walks on Diamond and whips him. Then she and Pollard have an affair. They have a fight on the beach and he knocks her out and a guy she thought was a friend turns out to be a hitman. Mindless junk directed by James Bryan (DON'T GO IN THE WOODS (1981)). He and lead actress Harmon later made THE RETURN OF LADY STREETFIGHTER (1990).

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Who Needs It?

 

 (themoviedatabase.org)

THE HOWLING: REBORN-2011-This boring shit has something to do with a nerdy kid and a bunch of assholes who are werewolves. There's a lot of talk, overacting and eventually some werewolves show up at the end. Obviously made to cash in on the success of the TWILIGHT franchise, this was filmed in Canada and co-written and directed by Joe Mimziki who was once an executive with Sony Pictures.

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Bow and Arrow Stuff

 

 (imdb)

AVENGED-2013-Zoe (Amanda Adrienne) deaf woman traveling alone in California is tortured and killed by a group of white trash scumbags. An American Indian Grey Wolf (Joseph Running Cloud) finds her body. During some kind of burial ritual, she's brought back to life now inhabited by a vengeful Apache spirit. She screws most of up her killers pretty good, mostly with a bow and arrow. The spirit is a mean looking green guy who's getting revenge because a retarded redneck family killed a lot of Indians. 

Lots of flashing lights, yelling and emoting. It might sound good but it's badly made by director Michael S. Ojeda. 

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Boggy

 

 (imdb)

BOGGY CREEK ll: AND THE LEGEND CONTINUES-1983-Anthropologist Dr. Brian Lockhart (writer/director Charles B. Pierce) takes 3 students, Tim (Chuck Pierce), Tanya (Serene Hedin), Leslie (Cindy Butler) on a trek to find “The Boggy Creek Creature” in Arkansas. They wander around and Lockhart tells some Bigfoot stories (shown in flashbacks). At night, while camping they have a creature encounter. Lockhart shoots it with a tranquilizer dart but nothing happens. The “dumb” girls go joy riding and get stuck in the mud. They kind of encounter the creature and run away. Later, they meet Old Man Crenshaw (Jimmy Dlem), a fat, shirtless hillbilly in overalls who's holding a wounded baby creature. During a storm, the creature attacks but Lockhart gives it the baby and it leaves. 

Stupid, low budget, badly acted sequel although it is actually the third movie in the “Boggy Creek series”! Chuck Pierce had previously starred in his dad's WINDS OF AUTUMN (1976).

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Jethro Makes Bad

 

 (imdb)

MACON COUNTY LINE-1974-Two ignorant redneck brothers Wayne (Jesse Vint) & Chris (Jesse's real life brother Alan) drive around causing trouble before they are scheduled to join the army. They pick up hitchhiker, Jenny (Cheryl Waters). While waiting for a mechanic (Geoffrey Lewis) to fix their water pump, they run into deputy sheriff Reed Morgan (Max Baer; Jethro Bodine from TV's “The Beverly Hillbillies”). He questions them and picks up his son (Lief Garrett) at military school. Two perverted criminals kill Baer's wife. After killing a cop, they are arrested. Baer believes the brothers are responsible and with his 10-year-old son in tow, goes after them. 

Terrible, violent low budget drive-in fodder. Also with Doodles Weaver, Jay Adler, Sam Gilman, Emile Meyer and Joan Blackman. Jed's nephew was a co-writer (with director Richard Compton) and co-producer on this obviously trying to throw off his dumb hayseed image.

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No Mania

 

 (imdb)

BLOOD MANIA-1970-A doctor (Peter Carpenter, also one of the screenwriters) is blackmailed for doing abortions when he was a med student. He has an affair with Victoria (Maria De Aragon), who's bed- ridden father is his patient. After the blackmailer rapes the doc's wife, Victoria uses a drug to kill dad. She admits to the doctor that she killed her dad but she promises to give him money from her inheritance to pay off the blackmailer. Her sister Gail (Vicki Peters) comes for the reading of the will. Surprise! Dad leaves everything to Gail. Victoria has a break-down but it doesn't bother the doc. He just romances Gail. 

This drawn out psychological bs has bad acting, a boring story, hardly any blood and plodding direction from Robert Vincent O'Neil who later directed ANGEL (1984) and its sequel AVENGING ANGEL (1984). Star Carpenter was a mystery man for years. It had been thought he passed away in the early '70's but in fact left movie making for real estate and died of AIDS in 1996. He also starred in POINT OF TERROR in 1971 with Dyanne Thorne. 

Co-star Maria De Aragon was later in Harry Essex's terrible THE CREMATORS (1972) and was unbilled as the alien Greedo in the first STAR WARS movie in 1977.

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Ator Returns

 

 (imdb)

CAVE DWELLERS-1984-In from this sequel to ATOR, an alchemist Akronas (Charles Borromel) tells his daughter Mila (Lisa Foster) about the warrior Ator (flashbacks from the first movie). He sends her on a quest to find him. On her way, she fights some soldiers and is shot with an arrow. She finds Ator (Miles O'Keefe) and his mentor Thong (Kiro Wehara). After she proves who she is, she convinces Ator to help her dad. The three head back for the castle. After Ator and Throng fight invisible beings, Mila is taken prisoner by cave people but the Ator saves her. The villain is Zor (David Cain Houghton), a very unintentionally funny long-haired guy who sounds like “The Master” from MANOS, HANDS OF FATE at times! Ator is betrayed by his hometown and nearly sacrificed. He even hang-glides. For some reason there's an atomic explosion at the end. 

Director Joe D'Amato (real name Aristide Masaccesi) hid behind the pseudonym David Hills for this as he did on Part 1. CAVE DWELLERS is the TV version of ATOR 2: THE INVINICBLE (aka THE BLADE MASTER) presented by Film Ventures with scenes from another movie shown during the credits.

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“You're damaged merchandise and this is a fire sale!"

 

(imdb)

SCUM OF THE EARTH!-1963-Photographer Harmon Johnson (Thomas Wood aka Harry Kerwin) deals in porn. He watches dispassionately while his dumb assistant Ajax (Craig Maudslay Jr.) abuses model Sandy (Sandra Sinclair). The head of the ring is a slimy guy named Lang (Lawrence J. Aberwood) who forces Sandy to “recruit” new girls. She gets innocent college hopeful Kim (Louise Downe) to pose for Johnson. After a few shots, suddenly she's posing naked and being abused by Larry (Mal Arnold; Fuad Ramses in BLOOD FEAST), another of Lang's sleaze bag henchman. Later, Lang gives Kim a lecture where the camera has a close up of his mouth while he spats insults. At another shoot, Ajax attacks Kim and Johnson beats him to death with a baseball bat. Sandy stands in for Kim (who they sent away) and stands by Johnson, providing him with a witness that it was self-defense. The cops are alerted and Lang shoots Larry. The police chase Lang to a beach where Lang hits the water. Now trapped, Lang shoots himself. After Kim and Johnson say their goodbyes, the voice of director Herschel Gordon Lewis is heard warning against the scum of the earth. 

This black and white exploitation film was made just a few weeks after Lewis' infamous BLOOD FEAST (which lead actress Downe wrote the screenplay for). It's pretty cheap looking and reminded me of an Ed Wood movie (Wood made THE SINISTER URGE about a porn racket in 1960).

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Johnny Vik

 

 (imdb)

JOHNNY VIK aka THE HUNTED-1977-Johnny Vik (Warren Hammack) is an unbalanced Native American shell-shocked Vietnam vet who acts very weird, won't take his meds, has mood swings and can't find a job. He kind of freaks out while washing windows at a mental hospital. He gets 30 days for peeing in public but later jumps bail and lives in the forest. The sheriff (John Favre) and a posse think Johnny  in an old shack. He fires a tear gas bomb but the shack was only being occupied by a mother and her children. After Johnny wanders around a lot he meets a strange woman Kola (Mary Jane McNaughton) who occasionally narrates. In the end nothing really happens and Johnny is hunted down and killed by the sheriff and his gang (for urinating in public?!). 

Badly made regional drama by writer/director Charles Nauman.

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Brad Dourif, Mad Doctor

 

 (imdb)

MALIGNANT-2013- Allex (Gary Cairns), a man grieving over the death of his wife and sinking deeper into alcoholism gets an involuntary treatment from a mad doctor (Brad Dourif) who likes to use implants and lobotomies. If you're a fan of the underrated Dourif you might want to see this drawn-out mess. 

The director Brian Avenet-Bradley is also a TV editor.

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If I Only Had A Brain Machine

 

 (imdb)

THE BRAIN MACHINE-1972-Four people volunteer for a government experiment run by two weird male doctors (Gil Peterson and Doug Collins) and female doc (Barbara Burgess) for the Environmental Control Center. Nothing much happens except the 4 have a lot of hang ups. Everything goes awry in this confused low budget boredom. 

With Gerald McRaney as one of the guinea pigs, Stuart Lancaster as a senator and James Best as a preacher. Director Joy N. Houck Jr. had previously made NIGHT OF BLOODY HORROR (1969) and WOMEN AND BLOODY TERROR (1970), both with McRaney.

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Revoke Her Visa!

 

 (tmdb)

EMANUELLE IN AMERICA-1977-Low budget sex-oriented junk with fashion photographer Emanuelle (Laura Gemser) getting involved with a white slavery ring and snuff films while taking off her clothes at the drop of a hat. As usual Gemser's then husband Gabrielle Tinti co-stars. Pretty badly made, this Italian production was directed by Joe D'Amato (ANTROPOPHAGUS (1980), ABSURD (1981) and many other titles with the name Emanuelle in them).

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Eddie Ruined Her

 

 (etsy)

YOU RUINED ME, EDDIE-1960-In Florida, spoiled rich girl Joan Denton (Jeanne Rainer) and laundry mechanic Eddie have been rollicking in the woods all summer and Joan is pregnant. Eddie is kind of a loser who won't take Joan for an abortion because he loves her, wants to marry her and wants a child. But she's too much of a snob. “I hate you! You're a hick!”. She tells her father but he thinks he can buy off Eddie who everyone thinks is crazy because he wants the baby. He's arrested on a phony robbery charge. Dad is devastated but Joan can only think of herself. He's also upset when Eddie is beaten in jail. Later Eddie escapes and Joanie, obviously nutty, goes after him with a gun. She wounds him and chases him through the forest in her robe and underwear. Copyright 1958. 

Also known as THE TOUCH OF HER FLESH, it was produced and directed by R. John Hugh made some other Florida based movies like NAKED IN THE SUN (1957) and FALL GIRL (1961).

 (themoviedb.org)

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Step Right Up!

 

 (imdb)

STEPS FROM HELL-1990-Some vampire demon Vlad (Bernardo Rosa) is searching for a gateway. The tale seems to be told in flashback by a writer to his would-be research assistant. They both act like they'd rather be someplace else. After his father is killed, a priest (Ron O'Dell) goes looking for Vlad, whose chief henchman is a huge black transvestite. He has a funny fight with a black couple in the woods. Later he and a ghoul girl attack some guys in a van and eat one of them. One guy who escapes beats up the huge guy with terrible martial arts moves but is killed anyway. Then later suddenly the big guy is chasing a woman. She beats him with a stick and stabs him but the undead woman grabs her. Later the priest fights Vlad in a good vs. evil finale in slow motion. Beelzebub shows up at the end too. 

The date on the film is 1990 but it looks like some washed out regional release made in the early '70's with bright lighting that suddenly goes dark, outrageously bad acting (most of the actors seem in a coma), too much talk and all the voices seem to be slowed down somewhat. Writer/director James Adam Tucker was also an actor (He played a cop on John Waters' HAIRSPRAY).

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"Stepping High" by Eddie Murray:

https://youtu.be/gT_VKzw18S8?si=x-DaJoAtd5ZRLZgy

Dino-Men

 

 

 (imdb)

UNKNOWN ISLAND-1948-A guy Ted (Phillip Reed) and his fiancé' Carole (Virginia Grey), hire a boat from a tough hardnosed but fairly intelligent captain (Barton McLane; TREASURE OF SIERRA MADRE the same year)) and his first mate (Dick Wessell; DICK TRACY VS. CUEBALL (1946)). They want to go to an uncharted island where the guy says dinosaurs still exist. They take along Baxter (Richard Denning), a guy who drinks a lot because he was once on the island. They shove off despite Baxter's warnings and the native crew unsuccessfully tries to mutiny. 

Landing on the island they encounter many prehistoric beasts including Brontosaurs, a T-Rex and a red-haired ape-like creature (uncredited Crash Corrigan). It becomes obvious that Ted cares more about photographing the prehistoric wildlife than anyone's life, including Carole's. Then just when everyone is ready to leave the captain announces he plans to capture the T-Rex alive. The group find a "dinosaur graveyard" and are attacked and the first mate is killed. Later the native crew steal the rowboat, but they all drown. The captain comes down with jungle fever and accidentally burns their supplies. He later kidnaps Carole but Baxter saves her and the captain is killed by the ape who then battles a T-Rex. The survivors make it to the boat and Baxter's heroics win Carole's heart.

 (imdb)

 Terribly cheap color production directed by Jack Bernhard with men in dino costumes, rear projection action and studio jungle sets. Star Virginia Grey had quite a career. She worked with Laurel & Hardy, The Marx Brothers, Abbott & Costello, Rondo Hatton, Johnny Weissmuller and started her career playing Eva in the 1927 version of UNCLE TOM'S CABIN. She and co-star Richard Denning were later in the seldom seen SF film TARGET EARTH in 1954. Co-star Phillip Reed's last role was HARUM SCARUM (1965) with Elvis Presley.

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Low Grade Savages

 

 (youtube)

SAVAGES FROM HELL-1968-In some small town, Marco (Diwaldo Myers) and his sister Teresa (Vi Lloyd) are migrant workers with their parents. They don't like the work so Marco gets a job as a mechanic. Teresa likes to hang around the gas station and meets High Test (William P. Kelly), the leader of a gang of bikers who she thinks is wonderful but he's just a dirty asshole in a jaguar vest. When he finds his girlfriend Lucy (Bobbie Byers) coming on to gas attendant Reuben (Cyril Poitier) a fight ensues which Marco breaks up. The next day High Test takes Teresa to the dune buggy races but she spurns his advances and Marco winds up slugging him. High Test vows revenge. Later he kidnaps Teresa and shoots Lucy. Mortally wounded, Lucy leads Marco & Reuben to the hideout where after a couple of fights, Teresa is rescued and Lucy runs High Test down before dying. Terrible acting.

Director Joseph G. Prieto made FIREBALL JUNGLE the same year. One of the screenwriters was K. Gordon Murray. Cyril Poitier was the lesser-known older brother of Sidney.

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Dead End

 

 (imdb)

LAST HOUSE ON DEAD END STREET-1973-Convicted drug dealer Terry Hawkins (writer/director Roger Watkins under a pseudonym) is released from jail and is tired of people telling him what to do. He talks like an asshole to different people about making a movie and at a party a hunchback whips a woman. The rest of this garbage is Terry ranting (“I'm making this fucking movie”), whispering, smoking and killing people for his ridiculous snuff films. Later on he and his screwed-up gang graphically torture and cut up a woman. Then they kill another guy and the morons seem to get away with their crimes but a voice-over says they were later apprehended and put in jail. The director should have been put in a padded cell.

This monstrosity supposedly crawled out of a much longer "opus" called “The Cuckoo Clocks from Hell” which they say was so repugnant and annoying that patrons rioted and burned down a theater! I've seen that version on a list of lost horror films and I'm sure it belongs there. Everyone in this thing hid behind phony names and according to some sources, no one admitted being associated with it until 2000! Director Watkins went on to make a bunch of porno movies...

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Who Are The Overlords of the UFOs?

 

 (youtube)

OVERLORDS OF THE U.F.O.-1976-Ultra cheap pseudo-documentary investigation trying to answer the question: Who are the overlords of the UFOs? 

Writer/Producer/on screen narrator W. Gordon Allen talks about outer space UFOs, inter-dimensional UFOs, NASA's reluctance to admit the UFO existence, astronauts seeing UFOs and how the Morman faith may have been created by an alien encounter. There are a few short interviews with investigators (like Stanton Friedman) and abductees but mostly it's a lot of stock footage, photos and drawings depicting what's being said. The budget was obviously too minuscule to afford recreations. Allen says "It's obvious humans are helpless", but as long as there's an off button we don't have to be. Then suddenly in the middle of this boring narrative there's a mini feature thrown out called "Space Voyage from Ummo", some phony nonsense about aliens who use telepathy and dimensional travel to scout the solar system. Even charlatan psychic Uri Geller is thrown in at the end.

 In 1950's, presenter Allen owned several radio stations in Oregon before he threw his hat into the political ring running for state senator in 1958 before dropping out. Getting into Ufology soon after this, he claimed the moon was occupied by intelligent life. He was accused of bankruptcy fraud in 1972 but seems to have recovered enough to produce this epic a few years later. He died in 1988. 

(My info came from:  https://hatch.kookscience.com/wiki/Main_Page  

Presenter Mr. Allen 

I couldn't find any info on director G. Brook Stanford. 

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Crap Train To Terror

 

 (imdb)

NIGHT TRAIN TO TERROR-1985-On a train, a terrible rock band play. Also on the train are God (un-billed Ferdy Mayne) and Satan (un-billed Tony Giorgio) who discuss various things in this low budget trilogy. 

In the first story, “The Case of Harry Bilings”, an accident victim named Harry (John Phillip Law) is turned into a weirdo who drugs women and brings them to an institution where a big doofus intern Otto (Richard Moll) rapes and dismembers them and sells their body parts. Later a female doctor lobotomizes a male doctor. Harry decapitates Otto and discovers the male doctor operating on the female doctor. I thought this might have been a misfire black comedy despite the subject matter.

Number 2: “The Case of Gretta Connors”. A musician named Greta (Merideth Hayes) is turned into a porno actress by a jerk named George (J. Martin Sellers). Glen, a preppie type sees one of Gretta's movies and falls in love with her. Somehow, he meets her and they become lovers. It turns out George is the head of “The Death Club” whose members have all had brushes with death. Something called a “Transinian Winged Beetle” (terrible animation) stings a guy to death and his eyeballs explode. They also play an electrocution game where an African American guy is burned to death. Later they play a game of death with a construction ball that looks like something from the '60's “Batman” TV show.

The third story is called “The Case of Claire Hansen”, Mr. Weiss (Marc Lawrence) enlists a police Lt. (Cameron Mitchell) and his assistant Dieter (also Marc Lawrence) to help him trap a Nazi. Then Weiss is killed by a fanged monster. Coroner Claire Hansen (Faith Cliff) examines the body. Her husband Peter is the author of the book “Is God Dead?”. A guy named Papini warns Peter the devil is coming for him. The Nazi is now the still young Mr. Oliver (Robert Bristol), a murderer sporting goat legs. The boyfriend of one of Oliver's victims tries to kill him but is crushed by a red eyed monster (terrible animation). Strange rubbery demons attack Claire but it seems to be an illusion. A priest tells her she was picked by God to battle the devil. He gives her a box and tells her to cut out Oliver's heart and put it in the box. A badly animated monster kills Papini. The Lt and Dieter are blown up. Then Oliver turns into a demon (bad puppet) and kills Peter. Somehow Claire runs Oliver down with her car and takes him to a hospital to remove his heart. Everything goes awry in the bloody operating room finale but Satan wins.

 The band plays some more but fortunately are killed when the train crashes. (but sadly, they seem to come back to life) This out of whack z budget trilogy was actually made from three full length or almost finished films and the third story actually was released in full length form as CATACLYSM. Four directors are credited but the screenwriting for all the stories go to one person, Phillip Yordan, who once won an Oscar for the screenplay of BROKEN LANCE (1954)!

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2 Downeys for the Price of One

 

 (imdb)

CHAFED ELBOWS-1966-Dismore (George Morgan), a moron who is having an affair his mother (Elsie Downey), gets involved with a lot of weird people in this underground hit made by Robert Downey Sr. using still photos, post-synced dialogue and one short color scene. Very much a product of its time, some of the dialogue is clever but dated. Downey's wife plays all the female parts. Doesn't even try to hide the fact it's sub low budget. Just goes with it.

 (imdb)

BABO 73-1964-Nonsensical black & white low budget political satire about Sandy Sudsbury (Taylor Mead), the newly elected President of the United Status. He tackles the cold war, racial discrimination and two-faced politicians. Some of the dialogue is funny. Written, produced and directed by Robert Downey Sr. I'm sure this and CHAFED ELBOWS (see above) influenced John Waters. Taylor Mead was in many early Andy Warhol shorts.

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