Tuesday, July 28, 2009

German Zombies



ZOMBIE DOOM-1999-Three numbskulls land on an island and are captured by a group in metal masks toting machetes. They are part of a community of maniacs led by “The Meister”, their scarred over acting leader (the director). His father, a messed up guy with metal arms and legs sits by and gets excited during a triple guillotine execution. After one of the numbskulls is killed the remaining two are joined by a “failed” Asian guard and set loose in a zombie-infested forest to be hunted ala THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME. Meanwhile an idiotic doctor with a Hitler moustache does experiments on victims’ brains similar to DR. BUTCHER M.D.

After the two numbskulls are killed the guard is joined by some other (Asian) escapees (who have dubbed in comically racist voices). They beat up the zombies and take revenge. The anything goes storyline features a battle with bad black robed ninjas, a “Jason” clone who looks more like one of TV Mikels’ “Astro Zombies” and even “The Master of The Flying Guillotine” shows up! The fight scenes are extremely gory and laughable.

All the bloody effects are over the top and pretty phony. Heads are cut in half, eyes are gouged, limbs are cut off, victims are disemboweled and blood spurts everywhere. But the worse part is the dubbing. It’s so totally off and un-synched like they didn’t care at all! Most of it is shot on video but one particularly gruesome flashback (featuring full frontal nudity and terrible stop animation) is on film. In the movie’s most disgusting scene a guy’s ass is ripped open. It’s actually the third part of a trilogy entitled VIOLENT SHIT.



ZOMBIE 90-1991-What the hell are they smoking in Germany??

The “creative minds“ behind ZOMBIE DOOM are also responsible for this deplorable horror zombie gore film. The American distributors must have realized how moronic the whole thing was and dubbed it with ridiculous voices that have no business being attached to the characters. For example the mad white surgeon talks in cliqued black jive. His assistant has a high cartoonish voice. Meanwhile zombies roam the countryside eating hapless victims. It’s very excessive and derivative and most of it makes no sense. “To Be Continued” is threatened at the end!

Both these movies are the product of German director Andreas Schnaas, a kind of modern day HG Lewis. He seems to “borrow” from every horror genre (Italian cannibal, Romero’s Dead series, Shaw Bros Kung Fu) and for some reason even remade Joe d’Amato’s 80’s cult classic ANTHROPOPHAGOUS. In 2002 he made a horror film in the US called NIKLOS. Apparently he’s not ready to go away.


Thanks for reading!

8 comments:

The Bloody Pit of Horror said...

I saw another movie from this same guy and I think that might be enough to hold me over until I croak. :)

CavedogRob said...

I agree! One's plenty!

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Anonymous said...

Just popping in to say nice site.

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Anonymous said...

Hello. And Bye. Thank you very much.

Anonymous said...

Hello. And Bye. Thank you very much.

Anonymous said...

Hello. And Bye.