“What's a Vampire?”

 

 (imdb)

DRACULA 3000-2004-In the future when dope is legal and no one believes in God, Captain Abraham Van Helsing (Casper Van Diem) leads a salvage team (which includes Erika Eleniak, Coolio and Tiny Lister). There's also a whiny guy in a wheelchair who's like a cross between Eddie Deezen and Robbie Robertson. They investigate a 50 year old derelict space ship. Coolio turns into one of the worst vampires in vampire film history. Count Dracula is somehow on board. He's from planet Transylvania in the Carpathian solar system. 

Really! I didn't make it up! 

Udo Keir is also in it. 

Written and directed by Darrell Roodt (PREY (2007))

Thanks for reading!

South Africa

PREY-2007-Peter Weller (he made good movies once, right?) is an engineer who takes his dysfunctional family (teenage daughter doesn't get along with step-mom) with him when he goes to Africa to build a dam. Mom (Bridget Moynahan), daughter (Carly Schroeder and young son (Connor Dowds) go for a tour in a game preserve and wind up trapped in an SUV being stalked by lions. Some poachers help them get water. Meanwhile dad and a white hunter look for them. This South African produced CUJO inspired tale features a lot of arguing, screaming and unrealistic twists. It was directed by Darrell Roodt. 

Thanks for reading!