It's Not Baron Barracuda

 

 (imdb)

BARRACUDA-1970-In some hick Florida town, full of grouchy people, Oceanographer Mike (Wayne David Crawford) tries to prove a local chemical company, Jack Chemical is polluting the water. The owner (Bert Freed) has him arrested but nice guy sheriff (BLOOD FEAST's William Kerwin) lets him go. Mike and the sheriff's daughter (Roberta Leighton) investigate. Swimmers are being killed by some deadly fish. When loads of dead fish wash up on shore, the sheriff becomes concerned. Meanwhile, men in dark suits wander around suspiciously. A local doctor (Jason Evers from THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE (1962)) helps the sheriff determine that killer barracuda are on the prowl due to chemicals from the plant. A reporter (dressed to look like Carl Kolchak) also investigates. Another guy in a suit (Harry Kerwin) kills people too. But the doctor is actually behind The Lucifer Project, a government experiment to control people through their blood sugar levels. 

This killer fish conspiracy film by director Harry Kerwin with underwater scenes directed by star Crawford (who also co-wrote and co-produced) is pretty bland.

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They're Not Scaring Anybody

 

SCARECROWS-1988-A bunch of dumb bank robbers in a hijacked plane go to a cornfield to get their hidden loot. One of them parachutes out planning on taking the 3 million for himself. The others land the plane and go looking for him. He's killed by a scarecrow, then brought back to life and beats up some of his partners until they decapitate him. Scarecrows seem to be running around the cornfield, resurrecting dead people and borrowing their limbs. 

Sound good? It actually sucks. 

The only actor (?) I knew in it was Ted Vernon, the little bald guy from that Florida wrestling movie HAMMERHEAD JONES (1986). Co-written, produced and directed by William Wesley in Florida. Cinematographer Peter Deming had already shot EVIL DEAD 2 (1987) and went on to work with David Lynch and do many high-profile movies like the “Austin Power” series.

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In Your Pants

 

 (imdb)

EMPIRE OF THE ANTS-1977-Con woman Joan Collins tries to interest a boat load of prospective suckers into buying Florida swamp land. 

Unfortunately for the party, giant ants (contaminated by radioactive waste) decided to invade and munch on the cast. The phony insects superimposed on the screen is a riot. They're too big. “Oh my God, they're herding us like cattle!” says one disgruntled character. Robert Lansing holds things together as the grizzled boat captain (with an earring). John David Carson (THE SAVAGE IS LOOSE) helps out. Brooke (daughter of Jack) Palance gets killed. When Albert Salmi (also in THE COMING for the same director) shows up as a sheriff it develops into a conspiracy story involving a sugar factory and slavery lead by the queen ant. 

Bert I. Gordon (who died in 2023 at the age of 100) made this giant bug movie which seems influenced by his earlier projects, FOOD OF THE GODS and VILLAGE OF THE GIANTS. Gordon from Wisconsin made TV commercials before making his first feature KING DINOSAUR in 1955.

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Eddie Ruined Her

 

 (etsy)

YOU RUINED ME, EDDIE-1960-In Florida, spoiled rich girl Joan Denton (Jeanne Rainer) and laundry mechanic Eddie have been rollicking in the woods all summer and Joan is pregnant. Eddie is kind of a loser who won't take Joan for an abortion because he loves her, wants to marry her and wants a child. But she's too much of a snob. “I hate you! You're a hick!”. She tells her father but he thinks he can buy off Eddie who everyone thinks is crazy because he wants the baby. He's arrested on a phony robbery charge. Dad is devastated but Joan can only think of herself. He's also upset when Eddie is beaten in jail. Later Eddie escapes and Joanie, obviously nutty, goes after him with a gun. She wounds him and chases him through the forest in her robe and underwear. Copyright 1958. 

Also known as THE TOUCH OF HER FLESH, it was produced and directed by R. John Hugh made some other Florida based movies like NAKED IN THE SUN (1957) and FALL GIRL (1961).

 (themoviedb.org)

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Z Marks The Spot

ZAAT-(1975)-In Jacksonville, Florida a weird scientist plans to take over the world. We hear his thoughts about "his fish friends" while different species are shown. The dialogue is great! "Fish, mighty hunter of the deep. I love you". He calls a shark his friend and says "Soon I'll swim with you". After this intro we see the scientist on shore (his voice doesn't match his wimpy stature). Since he said he admired the shark it only seems natural his experiment for world domination must involve him turning into a shark-man right?

Wrong! He instead uses his special formula called "Zaat" to transform himself into a walking catfish man! It's a big green emo-tionaless monster (with a fur collar) that kind of looks like something from the TV show "Voyage To The Bottom of The Sea"!

Once transformed he decides to take a break from conquering humans to killing a few. Namely some former colleagues who called him insane. Everytime he kills footage of sea life is intercut.

Meanwhile an African American scientist (Gerald Cruse) and a redneck sheriff (Paul Galloway) investigate the walking catfish pheomena that is plaguing the local hicks. After killing the men who wronged him Zaat goes looking for a mate. His first experiment goes wrong and his victim dies. Husband and wife government agents are called in to figure out who's doing the killing. They set up several traps and talk a lot. The sheriff can't believe a monster is responsible and somehow con-veniently forgets to mention that a local doctor name Leopold was once doing secret exper-iments trying to cross humans with fish!

He manages to remember ("I never thought about it..till a second ago") just in time for the climax where Zaat decides the female agent should become his Mrs. The three male leads all die. Zaat is morally wounded (apparently) and goes to the sea to die. The female agent follows him into the water (I guess the last experiment worked!). The End.



I first saw ZAAT in a theater on 42nd Street in Manhattan in the early '80's under the title THE BLOOD WATERS OF DR. Z. People were shouting and laughing the whole time so I shouldn't have been surprised when the next time it resurfaced was in an episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000 but I was!

I was even more surprised when TCM showed it one night around 3 AM!

ZAAT isn't that bad as bad movies go. The monster is kind of funny, there are some lapses in editing and in one or two scenes it looks like the monster is waiting for his cue (the actor Wade Popwell probably couldn't hear very well with that monster suit on) but the acting is ok and there's some gore. The highlight is the monster's movements (going up stairs, freaking out in a pharmacy, operating a board with flashing lights) and his hysterical revenge and fish loving tinged dialogue!

According to IMDB only one actor in ZAAT ever appeared in another movie. This seemed to apply to most of the crew also except for Director of Photograpy Jack McGowan who had shot CHILDREN SHOULDN'T PLAY WITH DEAD THING, DEATH DREAM and DERANGED.

Triple threat director/screenwriter/producer Don Barton was content to rest on his laurels after this and never made another movie. Too bad!

There's actually a website about it!: http://www.zaatmovie.com/

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