It's Mutiny!

 

 (imdb)

SPACE MUTINY-1988-On a spaceship going somewhere, the evil, insane Commander Calgon (John Phillip Law) plans to take over. He's assisted by the sadistic McPearson (James Ryan; KILL AND KILL AGAIN (1981)). Some alien women called Bellerians who speak telepathically are also aboard. Commander Jansen (Cameron Mitchell, with Santa beard) is in charge and his daughter, Lea (Cissy Cameron) blames pilot Dave Ryder (Reb Brown; HOWLING 2 (1985)) for the death of a professor. Of course, they fall in love. 

This very cheap looking filmed in a warehouse space opera was started by director David Winters who left for personal reasons. It taken over by Neal Sundstrum with scenes of the Bellerians added by David A. Prior after filming was finished. None of them were happy with the final product. Filmed in South Africa. Brown and Cameron are married in real life.

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Go Back To Sleep!

 

 (imdb)

PATRICK:EVIL AWAKENS-2013-Nurse Cathy (Sharni Vinson) goes to work for Dr. Roget (Charles Dance) and his uptight daughter Cassidy (Rachel Griffiths) in a ward for comatose patients. She meets Patrick (Jackson Gallager), a young man who's in a coma and Roget's “special case”. There's one patient who is awaken though, Mr. Frazier (Chris Fortuna), a victim of an electrical fire who operates a lighthouse. Cathy becomes friends with Paula the other nurse there. She comes to believe that Patrick is aware of things around him. She has weird dreams. But Patrick is controlling things, even using a computer and makimg her boyfriend burn both of his hands. 

Drawn out junk from Australia directed by Mark Hartley. It's based on the 1978 Richard Franklin film PATRICK.

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Jethro Makes Bad

 

 (imdb)

MACON COUNTY LINE-1974-Two ignorant redneck brothers Wayne (Jesse Vint) & Chris (Jesse's real life brother Alan) drive around causing trouble before they are scheduled to join the army. They pick up hitchhiker, Jenny (Cheryl Waters). While waiting for a mechanic (Geoffrey Lewis) to fix their water pump, they run into deputy sheriff Reed Morgan (Max Baer; Jethro Bodine from TV's “The Beverly Hillbillies”). He questions them and picks up his son (Lief Garrett) at military school. Two perverted criminals kill Baer's wife. After killing a cop, they are arrested. Baer believes the brothers are responsible and with his 10-year-old son in tow, goes after them. 

Terrible, violent low budget drive-in fodder. Also with Doodles Weaver, Jay Adler, Sam Gilman, Emile Meyer and Joan Blackman. Jed's nephew was a co-writer (with director Richard Compton) and co-producer on this obviously trying to throw off his dumb hayseed image.

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Lee Leaves

 

 (kungfufandom.com)

WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, SAI FUNG?-1999-Short docu-drama about Bruce Lee’s last days in Hong Kong before leaving for his temporary stay in the US. It stars Stephen Au who also produced, wrote and directed it and has become a big item in Asia. One story says Lee's estate stopped it from being release. It's also been announced that Au was working on a re-tooled DVD release.

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Martial Arts Soccer

 

 (imdb)

SHAOLIN SOCCER-2001-A crippled soccer player Golden Leg Fung (Man-Tat Ng) and Mighty Steel Leg Sing (co-writer/director Stephen Chow) who want to promote Shaolin Kung Fu and idolize Bruce Lee form a Shaolin soccer team with his 5 Shaolin brothers. They come up against Fung's ex-employer (Hung Yin Tse) and his Team Evil. 

Zany, anything goes, sometimes out of control comedy. Chow returned a few years later with KUNG-FU HUSTLE (2004).

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Chi

 

 (wikipedia)

SHANG-CHI AND THE LEGEND OF THE 10 RINGS-2021-Watch this unintentionally funny talk fest at your risk. Shang-Chi (Simu Liu, a Canadian actor born in China) is reunited with his estranged father Wenwu (Tony Leung) and his bug up her ass sister Xialing (Menger Zhang). Dad wants to find the land of Ta Lo where his wife is. Ben Kingsley as Trevor Slattery (The Mandarin in IRON MAN 3) acts like he just stepped out of a Monty Python skit. Shang has an annoying female friend Katy (Awkwafina) who provides gravel voiced bon mots (not). The actress who used to look like Michelle Yeoh is his aunt, the guardian of Ta Lo. 

Much of it seems to be an apology for having Asian stereotypes in other films. The director Destin Daniel Cretton (from Hawaii) must have known what he was doing as this was a colossal hit. He's said to be filming a new Spider-Man movie at the time of this writing.

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Where's My Piranha?

 

 (imdb)

PIRANHA-1972-Art (TV actor Tom Simcox) & Terry (Ahna Capri; had a role in ENTER THE DRAGON the next year), brother and sister photographers go to the Amazon with an American guide Pendrake (Peter Brown). She doesn't like guns even after Pendrake saves her life killing an attacking snake. After riding around and semi-exploring they meet a guy named Caribe (William Smith) at a bar. For some reason, Brown challenges Caribe to a motorcycle race. This takes up a good portion of the movie and still no PIRANHA! Then they all go to a diamond mine. Then an endless scene of people panning for gold. Then a sloth climbs a tree. We learn a lot about the characters background but not much about piranha. Not much happens until Caribe shows his true colors and rapes Terry. The killer fish do make an appearance in the finale. 

AKA “Piranha, Piranha”, it was filmed in Venezuela by someone named Bill Gibson. Smith and Brown had co-starred together on the “Laredo” TV series and had been in CROME AND HOT LEATHER the year before.

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Shatner & Spiders

 

KINGDOM OF THE SPIDERS-1977-Rancher Colby (Woody Strode) has sick cattle. His prize calf dies. Dr. Rack Hansen (William Shatner) takes some blood samples. Entomologist Diane Ashley (Tiffany Bolling) says the calf died of a spider bite. After Colby’s dog is found dead, he and his wife (Altovise Davis) show Rack & Diane a huge mound made by the spiders. They burn the mound but that doesn't seem to make the ants go away. While Rack & Diane are out horseback riding with his niece, Linda (Natasha Ryan), Colby is killed by the spiders. The mayor (Roy Engel) decides to crop dust the area with a deadly poison but the spiders make the plane crash. Linda's mom is also done in by the arachnids. Soon they are all over town and mass hysteria takes over. The survivors hole up in a cabin, where the next day seemingly forgotten by the outside world, the entire valley is one giant spider web. Also with Hoke Howell. 

Former actor John “Bud” Cardos (THE DARK (1979) directed this pretty decent low budget horror movie that's fairly creepy at times (especially the final scene). For years there was talk of a sequel form various sources but nothing ever panned out.

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Silent Western

 

 (youtube)

THE INVADERS-1912-Ancient western about a broken treaty between ranchers and the Sioux. Sometimes considered the “first great western”, its typical cowboys vs. Indians plot was probably pretty new in 1912. Star Francis Ford (younger brother John) co-directed it with Thomas Ince. Ford directed many short silent films and also acted into the 1950's.

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Mabuse Is Back

 

 (imdb)

THE TESTAMENT OF DR. MABUSE-1933-A counterfeit calls Capt. Lohman (Jim Gerald) to tell him he knows who's behind the ring but he goes insane before he can say who the leader is. Then a college professor gives a lecture on the history of the evil mastermind Dr. Mabuse, who's now in an insane asylum scribbling incoherent notes. 

Lehman investigates. At the asylum the man in charge sees an apparition while visiting Mabuse (Rudolph Klein-Rogge). Later, his assistant suggests that the doctor may not be crazy and using hypnotism to commit crimes. On his way to the police, he's killed. There's also Lilli (Monique Rolland) & Tom (Gustav Diessl) who are lovers. But ex-con Tom is torn between his love for Lilli and his criminal activities. When Mabuse dies, it seems his plans are still being carried out. Is he really dead? 

This followed Lang's first Mabuse movie DR. MABUSE, THE GAMBLER (1922), a gigantic 4 hour epic that had to be shown in 2 parts! It wouldn't be until 1960, 27 years later, that Lang would return with another sequel. The Mabuse character was created by German author Norbert Jacques in 1921.

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Creepy Hand

 

 (imdb)

THE CRAWLING HAND-1963-Mel Lockhart (Ashley Cowan), an astronaut coming back from the moon, seems to crack up and turns ghoul like. Steve Curan (Peter Breck) is in charge of the project and Allison Hayes (in her last movie role) is his kind of secretary. 

After the ship is deliberately blown up, Doc Weitzberg (Kent Taylor) thinks there's some kind of new organism being created. While rollicking on the beach with his gf, Marta (former Miss Iceland, Sirry Steffen), a guy named Paul (Rod Lauren) finds the severed arm of the astronaut. He wraps it up and takes it to his rooming house where it kills his landlady Mrs. Hotchkiss (Arline Judge in her last role). The sheriff (Alan Hale) and deputy (Ross Elliot) investigate. Paul is attacked by the hand but he doesn't killed. The hand seems to possess him. He acts strange and almost kills a restaurant owner (Syd Saylor in his last role). The hand slithers around. Occasionally, “The Bird's The Word” by The Rivingtons is heard. Also with Tristram Coffin and Richard Arlen. 

This cheapy sf horror was produced by Joe Robertson who served the same capacity on THE SLIME PEOPLE (1963) and AGENT FROM HARM (1964). He later got into porno films and wrote and directed 2 movies featuring Ed Wood,Jr., LOVE FEAST (1969) and MRS. STONE'S THING (1970). 

Noted “film doctor” Herbert L. Strock (HOW TO MAKE A MONSTER (1958)) directed. One of the screenwriters Joe Cranston, who later wrote THE CORPSE GRINDERS for Ted V. Mikels, was the father of actor Bryan Cranston. Co-star Rod Lauren had a brief musical career, made a few movie and TV appearances and later married a Philippine singing star. He in 2001 he was suspected of her stabbing murder. He fled to the US and committed suicide in 2007.

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Hope This Won't Be Me On Sunday!

 

 (imdb)

FROZEN ALIVE-1964-2 scientists Dr. Frank Overton (American actor Mark Stevens; once a contract actor at Warner Bros.) and Dr. Helen Wieland (German actress Marianne Koch; also in FISTFUL OF DOLLARS the same year) are doing research on suspended animation. After they win a special scientist award, the director Sir Keith (Walter Rilla; Dr. Mabuse' in several movies around this time) wants to break them up. When Frank wants his floozy, cheating wife, Joan (Delphi Lawrence) to retire and raise a family she refuses. Later, she gets drunk and insults Helen. Frank decides he'll use himself as a human experiment. While Frank and Helen are making preparations, elsewhere, Joan accidentally kills herself with a gun she stole from her lover. A police detective (Wolfgang Lukschy) thinks her death and hubby's experiments are related. Sir Keith agrees, thinking it's Frank's attempt at an elaborate suicide. Believing Frank will be arrested for murder when he wakes up, Helen decides to let him die. But then word arrives that Frank is innocent! She manages to correct her mistake and saves him. Everyone lives happily ever after. 

This low budget, un-thrilling West German/UK production was directed by Bernard Knowles who worked on several different UK television shows (“Col. March of Scotland Yard”, “Ivanhoe”). He made a few other feature films like SPACEFLIGHT IC-1(1965). He was also a cinematographer shooting many of Alfred Hitchcock's English films.

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Musical Carradine

 

 (imdb)

DOWN MISSOURI WAY-1946-Innocuous, low budget musical about a professor of agriculture (Martha O'Driscoll; HOUSE OF DRACULA the year before) and her educated mule (Shirley playing herself) and a film company using her land for a production. Mostly forgettable except for John Carradine as Thorny Dunning, the movie within a movie's director giving a deliberately hammy performance (he seems to be channeling John Barrymore). The professor and the movie's producer Burton (William Wright) fall in love. Singing star Gloria (Renee Godfrey) is jealous. 

The songs seem abnormally long in PRC production directed by Josef Berne and produced by Sam Sherman. Also with Roscoe Karns, Will Wright and Eddie Craven. Now forgotten leading man Wright was once touted as “World War 2's answer to Clark Gable”.

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Stuntman

 

 (themoviedatabase)

I'M STILL ALIVE-1940-Self-assured stuntman Steve Bennett (Kent Taylor) insults stuck up actress Laura Marley (Linda Hayes) and it's love at first sight. They get married and everything's fine until Laura gets upset at his stunt work. He decides to quit. Unfortunately, he has a hard time getting on without doing stunts. After a young stuntman is killed, Steve hits the skids and then barnstorms the country. Film producer Walter Blake (Ralph Morgan) tries to help. Eventually, his best friend Red (Howard DeSilva) helps him straighten out his life. Dick Elliot, Selmer Jackson, Sam McDaniels, Herb Vigran and retired silent film director Fred Niblo (as a film director) have unbilled roles. 

Harmless little B-movie directed by Irving Reis (THE GAY FALCON (1941)).

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Out of Season

 

 (imdb)

SEASON OF THE WITCH-2011-During the Black Plague, two former Crusaders Bemant (Nicholas Cage) and Felson (Ron Perlman) are dispatched by a dying, scarred cardinal (Christopher Lee) to deliver a witch (really a demon) to a group of monks who can destroy her power and break the plague. Good luck, I mean to the viewer, not them. 

Despite Nicholas Cage's deadpan performance, many of the characters dialogue seems modern and out of place. The CGI sfx are pretty LORD OF THE RINGS inspired. With the line: “We're going to need more holy water”. Director Dominic Sena had made GONE IN 60 SECONDS (2000), also with Cage.

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Rage

 

 (imdb)

RAGE-1972-Rancher Dan Logan (George C. Scott; also the director) has a nice life until he wakes up one day after camping with his son Chris (Nicholas Beauvy; later in THE TOOLBOX MURDERS (1978)) to find his cattle dead and Chris deathly sick. An army board headed by Col. Nickerson (Kenneth Tobey) (including Robert Walden and Stephen Young) seems concerned because it was an accidental spraying of some government poison gas. Major Halliford (Martin Sheen) and public health service guy Spencer (Barnard Hughes) assure him his son will be alright. 

Not true. Chris dies and the government seems to cover it up. Family physician Dr. Cardwell (Richard Basehart) finds some discrepancies in the medical reports. Logan sees through the government lies and finds his son’s dead body. Now a dying man, Logan goes for revenge but he dies before extracting real vengeance. Dabbs Greer is a doctor and Ed Lauter is an orderly. 

Two years after this Scott would direct one more film, the notorious THE SAVAGE IS LOOSE. This disappointing box office flop was actually based on a 1968 incident that took place in Utah where thousands of sheep were killed while the US army tested a new nerve gas. The army denied responsibility and other theories were presented. However, documents released 30 years after the incident occurred seem to say the army was at fault.

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It Falls Flat

 

 (imdb)

THE FALLING-1986-3 American dweebs (Dennis Christopher, Martin Hewitt & Lynn Holly Johnson) touring Spain (where this was filmed) are terrorized by an alien monster created by space fungus from the 1973 Skylab crash. They spend most of the time acting stupid and helping a weird NASA scientist (famous Spanish actor Luis Prendes). A gas station attendant explodes and an “Alien” like creature attacks. They escape in the end but one of them becomes infected so they all die I guess, Not sure, but some scenes may have been intentionally funny. 

Directed and written by Deran Sarafian (TO DIE FOR (1988)). Producer Carlos Aured (who directed early Paul Naschy movies) had nothing good to say about this production. Lead actress Johnson was US figure skater who'd starred in the Disney flop WATCHER IN THE WOODS (1980) and had a supporting role in the James Bond flick FOR YOUR EYES ONLY (1981).

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Would You Like Another Potato?

 

 (imdb)

DEATHSTALKER AND THE WARRIORS FROM HELL-1988-Deathstalker (John Allen Nelson; in KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE the same year) is back and more annoying than ever. In this very cheap looking second sequel, Deathstalker meets princess Carissa (Carla Herd) who's looking for a lost city. She's killed but before she dies, she gives him a stone that if it's united with a second one will open up the secret city. Unfortunately, a weird bald headed bad guy (Thom Christopher; WIZ-ARDS OF THE LOST KINGDOM (1985)) has the other one and rants to his companion Camisarde (Terri Treas; TV's “Alien Nation”). His clothes look like they were designed by Liberace. The dead princess also has a twin sister Elizena (same actress) who's a spoiled dummy. He also meets 2 bow & arrow using sisters who like potatoes. 

Roger Corman was the executive producer of this low grade, badly acted sword and sorcery fantasy filmed in Mexico and directed by Alfonso Corona. The screenplay is by Howard Cohen who wrote the original movie and later wrote and directed DEATHSTALKER 4 in 1991.

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Mike Hammer Time!

 

 (imdb)

MY GUN IS QUICK-1957-Mike Hammer (Robert Bray) meets a redhead (Jan Chaney) in a hash joint and soon after she winds up dead. Her missing ring leads him on a hunt to find her killer. The mute sweeper Jean (Terence De Marney) tries to help but he's thrown out a window. He meets Nancy (Whitney Blake), a woman who was involved in a scandal in Europe, whose butler Louis (Richard Garland) threatened Red in the hash joint. Some jewels stolen by Col. Holiday (Donald Randolph) are part of it. So is a stripper named Maria (Gina Core'). He butts heads with police Captain Chambers (Booth Colman) but they work together. A trio of French gangsters led by the hook handed LeRouch (Peter Mamakos) are also after the cache and beat up Mike. Pamela Duncan is Hammer's intrepid secretary, Velda. 

This is a pretty good, neglected version with the usual Hammer twist ending. Garland and Duncan both starred in Corman's ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS the same year. Two directors are credited, Victor Saville and George White.

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Killer Dragon?

 

 (imdb)

THE DRAGON MURDER CASE-1934-When a soon to be married man (George Meeker) goes swimming and disappears, Philo Vance (Warren William) is called in to help DA Markam (Robert McWade) and Sgt. Heath (Eugene Pallette) solve the case. After the body is found, it looks like the murder was committed by a dragon! 

Fun if preposterous murder mystery with the underrated William great in the lead role. This was his first of 4 four Vance crime dramas (he took the role over from William Powell). The Vance character was created by S.S. Van Dyne who wrote 12 novels featuring the detective. Also with Lyle Talbott and Margaret Lindsey. 

Director B. Bruce Humberstone later made a few Charlie Chan mysteries and PACK UP YOUR TROUBLES with Laurel & Hardy.

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Loose Lips Sink Ships

 (imdb)

RESISTING ENEMY INTERROGATION-1944-US Army training film instructing Prisoners Of War how not to give away vital information. The Nazi high command led by Carl Esmond (CATMAN OF PARIS (1946)) also includes Kent Smith (in CURSE OF THE CAT PEOPLE the same year), Peter Van Eyck, Peter Coe (in HOUSE OF FRANKENSTEIN the same year) and George Dolenz (Mickey's dad). They use a lot of tricks to get the captives to spill the beans. The US solders include James Seay, Don Porter, Richard Martin and Arthur Kennedy. They try to keep quiet but these Nazis are really deceitful. 

Music emphasizes every time a soldier gives away some vital info. Steven Geray is a doctor. Lloyd Nolan (who also narrates), Craig Stevens and David Wayne are non-POW pilots. The cast is all unbilled. Directed by Bernard Vorhaus (THE AMAZING MR. X (1948), SO YOUNG SO BAD (1950)). 

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Clark's Angels

 

 (internet movie cars database)

ANGELS REVENGE-1979-Las Vegas singer Michelle Wilson (Susan Kiger) ends her engagement at the palace. For some reason, Arthur Godfrey is in the audience. He goes backstage to congratulate her (he seems stoned). Then her manager (Alan Hale) tells her she's booked for Johnny Carson. She drops everything when her drug using brother Bobby gets beat up by a dealer. Bobby's teacher April (Jacqulin Cole; wife of the director) visits Michelle and in less than a minute she convinces Michelle that they can bust up the drug ring with a little help. They assemble a group of consisting of Terry Grant (Sylvia Anderson), a stunt woman. Karate teacher Kako (Lieu Chinh), ex-junkie-model Maria (Noela Velasco), policewoman Elaine Brenner (Robin Greer) and high schooler Trish (Liza Greer). They buy a van from Pat Buttram, then visit a comical right wing group lead by Lindsey March (Jim Backus) and steal their munitions. They torture a pusher (Darby Hinton) for info. The two guys behind the drugs are Mike (Jack Palance) and Burke (Peter Lawford). Neville Brand is listed in the credits but the version I saw cut his role. There are several comical fights in this useless “Charlie's Angels” rip-off directed by Greydon Clark (SATAN'S CHEERLEADERS (1977).

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The Un-Lost Clown

 

 (imdb)

FROM DARKNESS TO LIGHT-2024-This documentary looks into the stories surrounding the making of THE DAY THE CLOWN CRIED with a long interview (shown in segments) with director Jerry Lewis. Besides concentrating on the movie it's part biography focusing on Martin & Lewis, his other movies, Jerry Lewis theaters, etc. He talks a lot and others praise the film (like Martin Scorsese who hasn't even seen it). Some dismiss it (like Harry Shearer who had seen it). Later Lewis condemns it. It puts to rest some main rumors. The film wasn't locked away in some vault in Berlin. It was not lost or even unfinished. Lewis had a complete unedited working copy in his own vault. Much of the movie is shown (including the ending) and there's even production films. You can see Anton Diffring as the camp captain. Many people clamber for its release but see this first before you take a side.

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Happy New Year!