The Tomb

 

THE TOMB-1986-An idiot racist named John Banning (David O'Hara) has a disastrous time when he tries to sell an artifact to a woman named Jade (Sybil Danning). The credits roll while a band dressed like Egyptians sing "Tutti Frutti". John and his equally racist dimwit partner Tyler (Craig Hamann) find the ancient sarcophagus of Queen Nefradis. Before they can double cross and kill their guide the decrepit looking queen comes to life and kills the guide and Tyler. She (Michelle Bauer) becomes young from drinking blood. John escapes but she goes to get him. He has a fight in a bar where Kitten Navividad does a topless dance. A doctor Howard Phillips (Cameron Mitchell) says "I don't want to be seen with people like you". 

John sells him an artifact. He meets up with Nefradis again and she puts a scarab in him to control him. She wants the stuff he stole from her tomb and kills a doctor named Manners. Manners' son David (Richard Hench) and Phillips niece Helen (Susan Stokey) investigate and visit Dr. Andoheb (John Carradine) who fills us in on the blood princess. She almost sacrifices Helen but is destroyed. Maybe? Bad acting really ruins this low budget horror movie directed by Fred Olen Ray (HOLLYWOOD CHAINSAW HOOKERS).

Director Ray also made ARMED RESPONSE tha same year:

https://moviemeltdown.blogspot.com/2014/08/armed-response.html

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Terror

 

THE TERROR OF HALLOW'S EVE-2017-A bullied kid Tim (Caleb Thomas) summons a jester like demon called “The Trickster” to get revenge. A fat guy eats a pie full of worms and is gutted by a demon that eats his intestines. He sounds like Curly when he's screaming. A stoner is stabbed to death by puppets with knives. The main asshole has his throat slit. His girlfriend is next but Tim destroys the demon. She's killed anyway. Tim winds up possessed and getting blamed for all the deaths. Flash ahead many years later and adult Tim is in a mental hospital. It seems like the movie is going to start all over again and The Trickster is still at it...

Eric Roberts has one short scene as an angry father and Juliet Landau (one of the producers) has a brief role as a nurse. The director Tony Tucker did mainly SFX and make up for movies and TV before this... 

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The (A) Void

 

THE VOID-2016-This bloody violent tasteless horror movie is about a group of people trapped in a semi-abandoned hospital by a cult in white robes. A mad doctor (Kenneth Walsh) has "conquered death" and wants to bring back his dead daughter. He turns people into blob like tentacle monsters and the cast swears and screams a lot. This Canadian production has two directors Jeremy Gillespie and Steven Kostanski but one competent director would have been better.

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Merry Christmas!

 

SANTA CLAUS-1959-Out in space Santa Claus (Jose Elias Moreno) sets up a nativity scene, laughs insanely and watches children from all over the world make his toys. Lucifer sends his main man Pitch (Jose' Luis Aguirre) to Earth to make children do evil. Santa has some bizarre machines to help him. One machine has lips and his telescope has a tentacle with an eye on it. Pitch tries to corrupt a cute little girl named Lupita who only wants a doll. She has a “devil influenced” dream where large dolls dance and try to convince her to steal. Besides kids, Santa also gets help from Merlin the magician, a doddering old fool who gives Santa secret sleeping powders and a flower that makes him invisible. The red bearded key maker gives him a key that opens any door. He also has mechanical reindeer that pull his sleigh. Pitch corrupts three brothers who want to kidnap Santa and steal his toys. 

A side story is about a lonely rich kid who only wants to be with his neglectful parents on Christmas eve. Despite losing the sleeping powders and flower and being run up a tree by a dog Santa delivers all his presents and gives Lupita the doll she wanted. Actor/director Rene Cordona made this religious leaning craziness from Mexico.

Thanks for reading and Happy Holidays!

Two

 

SPIRIT STALKERS-2012-Another waste of time about a group of ghost hunters (led by writer/director/hack Steve Hudgins) investigating the paranormal. It's boring, talky, badly edited and acted. I don't understand the good reviews this crap gets!

THE CREEPY DOLL-2011-This is another amateur talky piece of junk from Big Biting Pig (see above) about a loony pregnant woman and her doll collection that features a ghoulish “Addams Family” like doll. Her husband is a dick and her in laws are morons. Not much happens. She walks around, makes faces, acts bitchy and talks to her dolls. Eventually she kills hubby, his ugly mistress, mom in law and a guy she almost has an affair with. Dumb ass ending. Written and directed by PJ Woodside.

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George Sanders

 

BLUEBEARD'S TEN HONEYMOONS-1960-Antique dealer Henri Landru (George Sanders) falls for cabaret singer Odette (Corinne Calvet). She says she needs 3000 francs to help her sick mother (yeah right). He tries to borrow money from another dealer (George Coulouris) and sell his watch but to no avail. Odette dumps him but he's persistent. He meets widow Vivian (Patricia Roc) and woos her to get her money and accidentally kills her but makes it look like suicide. He gives Odette the money even though he finds her with another man. Vivian's sister Giselle (Ingrid Hafner) goes to the police but they can't help. He then romances Juliette Gullin (Jean Kent) and eventually takes her to a secluded villa where he poisons her, cuts up her body and burns it. He repeats this process several more times just to make the ungrateful Odette love him. When one woman stalls their marriage plans he strangles her in a bathtub. 

Then he meets Jeanette (Greta Gynt) and after stabbing her to death, pretends to be her dead husband to get the contents of a safety deposit box. He also tries to bamboozle Mrs. Boyer (Selma Vas Diaz) about her dead husband being alive but then he catches Odette with another man. He takes her to the villa and gives her the kill, chop and burn treatment. Then Giselle discovers his identity and pays him a visit. They almost miss each other but when they meet he nearly kills her. Fortunately the police arrive and after a brief chase arrest him. In the final scene he is guillotined for his crimes. 

This is not a half bad little thriller made essentially better by the presence of George Sanders in the lead role. It could be the best film made by director W. Lee Wilder (KILLERS FROM SPACE). It was written by his son Myles.

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Walking Ghost

 

THE GHOST WALKS-1934-Theatrical producer Herman Woods (Richard Carle) and his beleaguered assistant Homer (Johnny Arthur) have car trouble during a storm. Their driver playwright Prescott Ames (John Miljan) takes them to the home of Dr. Kent (Henry Kolker) where his fiancee Gloria (June Collyer) happens to be. Also there is his rival Carroway (Douglas Gerrad). Also around is the spacey Beatrice (Eve Southern), Kent's patient who screams occasionally. Later at dinner Beatrice talks about a murder and that one of the present company is responsible for his death. 

At first it turns out to be a setup, a performance of Ames' play “The Ghost Walks” to impress Wood. But when Beatrice is murdered, it's no longer a play. Ames however can't convince Wood her death isn't part of the play. (her corpse disappears) Then a guard from a local sanitarium arrives to let everyone know a murderer has escaped. Later we learn the house they are in was once owned by a mad surgeon who committed suicide. 

Hidden doors, eyes looking through a painting, a deadly bed are just some of the strange goings on in this creaky but entertaining horror melodrama from director Frank S. Strayer CONDEMNED TO LIVE, THE VAMPIRE BAT).

https://moviemeltdown.blogspot.com/2010/04/bats-and-rains.html 

https://moviemeltdown.blogspot.com/search?q=condemned+to+live

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The Walking Karloff

THE WALKING DEAD-1936-The public believes Judge Shaw (Joe King) will never sentence guilty gangster Stephen Martin (Kenneth Harland) to anything extreme but much to everyone's disbelief  Shaw gives the thug 10 years. His sleazy lawyer Nolan (Ricardo Cortez)) and mob boss Loder (Barton McLane) hire hit man Trigger Sith (Joe Sawyer) to kill the judge. They set up ex-con pianist John Ellman (Boris Karloff) to take the fall. Two lab assistants Jimmy (Warren Hull) and Nancy (Marguerite Churchill; in DRACULA'S DAUGHTER the same year)) know Ellman is innocent but stupidly she doesn't want them to say anything. Ellman is convicted and sentence to death (good going, guys). At the last minute they tell their boss Dr. Beaumont (Edmund Gwenn) and he tells the crooked lawyer (who defended Ellman and helped frame him). Of course he does nothing. Ellman dies but fortunately (?) Beaumont has a machine that brings Ellman back to life. 

When revived Ellman is the worse for wear and can't remember anything. But when he hears Nancy playing the piano he sits down and starts to play. When he sees Nolan he calls him his enemy. Beaumont calls a conference with other egghead types that Loder, Nolan and their weak willed cronies also attend. They all get guilty conscientious and want to hire the same hit man as before but Ellman scares Trigger and he shoots himself. He then scares another member who's hit by a train and causes another to have a heart attack and fall out a window. 

Beaumont becomes kind of obsessed with knowing what Ellman felt when he was dead. Ellman leaves to walk around a cemetery and Mary follows him. Unbeknownst to her Loder and Nolan trail her. They shoot Ellman and get away. On his second death bed, Ellman tries to explain what death was like but dies before anything can be said. Ironically, Loder and Nolan are electrocuted when their getaway car crashes into an electric pole. 

Karloff is very sympathetic in the lead but doesn't have much dialogue. Director Michael Curtiz also made THE CHARGE OF THE LIGHT BRIGADE the same year. Co-star Ricardo Cortez was in POSTAL INSPECTOR with Lugosi the same year. 

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Dual Belas!

 BOWERY AT MIDNIGHT-1942-Prof. Brenner (Bela Lugosi) is a criminology teacher by day and at night he's Karl Wagner who runs a Bowery mission that's a front for robbery and murder. Sgt. Crawford (Dave O'Brien) investigates. Wagner's M.O. is to kill one accomplice at the scene of a crime. He recruits psycho killer Frank Mills (Tom Neal; he'd star in DETOUR in 1945) to help. Wagner's nurse Judy (Wanda McKay) doesn't suspect but her boyfriend Richard (John Archer) goes undercover as a bum to study the underprivileged and winds up dead. The nutty ending has an insane doctor resurrecting Wagner's dead victims who in turn kill him. Since Richard comes back to life he and Judy live happily ever after. When Richard is on the Bowery he meets two oddballs almost in a row. One is played by Pat Costello and the other by Bernard Gorcey! Wheeler Oakman, Victor Adamson and Snub Pllard have small roles.

Director Wallace Fox made several "East Side Kids" comedies (that were set in The Bowery) and directed Lugosi in THE CORPSE VANISHES the same year. After making PILLOW OF DEATH, one of the Inner Sanctum series of film at Universal he drifted into low budget westerns then went into TV (The Gene Autry Show, Ramar Of The Jungle). He dies in 1958.

https://moviemeltdown.blogspot.com/2020/01/vanishing-bride.html

Sam Katzman was the executive producer of this low budget quickie released through Monogram but it's not bad despite some lapses in reason!

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Apes Documentary

IMPACT OF THE APES-2008-This Fox Movie Channel production documentary is mainly about the marketing of PLANET OF THE APES merchandise. It shows that the merchandising and licensing of  the franchise really started not with the 5 classic movies but when the short lived TV series hit the airwaves! It's only around 20 minutes and very interesting. It's followed by the theatrical trailers. After that a guy named Tom Rothman (I think he was chairman of 20th Century Fox at the time) rehashes the original film's history in a bombastic narration.

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Two Kellys For the Price of One!

 

FEAR IN THE NIGHT-1947-Poor Vince Grayson (Deforest Kelley in his first feature film) is having weird nightmares that he killed a man. He finds several odd things (a key, a button, blood) that lead him to believe it might be true. His brother in law Cliff (Paul Kelly) tells him to forget about it. He's more concerned about his pregnant wife Lil (Ann Doran), Vince's sister. After they go to the house Vince saw in his dream, Cliff begins to suspect Vince is a murderer. A local deputy (Jeff York) fills them in on a double murder that took place a few days before. After Vince tries to commit suicide Cliff decides to help clear him. 

This little low budget film noir with a kind of long finale was written and directed by Maxwell Shane who later remade it as NIGHTMARE in 1956 (with Edward G. Robinson and Kevin McCarthy in the leads). It's based on a novel by Cornell Woolrich.

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House of The Damned

 

HOUSE OF THE DAMNED-1963-Architect Scott Campbell (Ron Foster) and his wife Nancy (Merry Anders) go to do a surveying job at an old castle (The Rochester House) after getting a midnight phone call from a guy named Joe (Richard Crane; THE ALLIGATOR PEOPLE) who that don't seem to like. They go to the castle but can't get in. Something weird is going on though as the door opens after they go away. Mr. Quinby (Dal McKennon), a real estate agent gives them the keys and a rundown on the castle including the former owner Priscilla Rochester. 

The couple settle in but it's obvious they are not alone. Especially at night when some creature shuffles in and steals the house keys. Next day the missing keys turn up but with 2 keys gone. Later Joe's wife Loy (Erika Peters) shows up looking for her husband. She decides to sunbathe and while undressing is watched by a mysterious woman. Scott and Nancy measure the house. Joe finally shows up. He and Loy seem to be having martial problems and Loy prepares to leave but is pursued by a giant (Richard Kiel; a year after EEGAH!) and disappears. The others look for her. 

Nancy finds her headless in a chair but still moving! Of course when she brings the two men Loy isn't there. Later Joe and Scott break into a locked room and find the withered corpse of Capt. Arbuckle, another former owner. When Scott has a run-in with the giant he's saved by a circus fat lady (Ayllene Gibbons; Later Mrs. Joyboy in THE LOVED ONE) because the captain was using the the castle to house circus people. It has a weird happy ending. Much like director Maury Dexter's THE DAY MARS INVADED EARTH it uses a large estate.

Keep Your Eyes On Quintillas

 

CURSE OF THE FACELESS MAN-1958-At a dig in Pompei a worker discovers a box of jewels and a 2000 year old kind of mummified man. While being transported in the back of a truck it shows signs of life. Carlo Fiorillo (Luis Van Rooten), head of the Pompei museum calls in Dr. Paul Mallon (Richard Anderson) to examine the body. He's assisted by former lover Maria (Adele Mara), Fiorillo's daughter and her fiancee Enrico (Gar Moore). 

Meanwhile the body comes to life and kills the truck driver. The truck crashes but the body is found intact and un-moving. Another egghead Dr. Emmanuel (Felix Locher) translates a medallion found on the body. It seems there's a curse that caused Mt. Vesuvius to erupt. They also learn the body's name is Quintillas (Bob Bryant). Paul's fiancee Tina (Elaine Edwards), an artist, paints a picture that looks like the body after seeing it in a dream. After viewing the body Tina becomes obsessed/hypnotized by it and visits the museum at night to make a sketch (apparently no locks are employed; she walks right in through the front door). While she's drawing, the body gets up and she faints. A guard's bullets fail to stop it. The body puts the medallion on Tina and becomes immobile again. Paul, Carlo and Maria put the brooch near the prone body of Q and he gets up and clobbers Paul who tried to stop him with an ax. Quintillas goes after Tina and chases her before collapsing again. When Emmanuel regresses Tina they learn she is the reincarnation of Q's lost love. After killing Enrico, Q grabs Tina and heads for the sea. The confused monster thinks he's saving his love from Vesuvius' destruction. The water dissolves Q and Paul rescues Tina. 

Slight Mummy inspired movie has a few nice touches by the great Edward L. Cahn and like many of Cahn's pictures a narrator gives the whole thing a kind of documentary type feel. In this case the narrator is the uncredited Morris Ankrum. The screenplay is by Jerome Bixby (who also penned IT!THE TERROR FROM BEYOND SPACE for Cahn a few years later).

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Another Sibling!

DAUGHTER OF DR. JEKYLL-1957-After an eerie intro about Robert Louis Stevenson's famous story where Mr. Hyde is called a "human werewolf" and he cackles "Are you sure?", Janet Smith (Gloria Talbott) comes to the house of her guardian Dr. Loomas (Arthur Shields) with her fiance George Hastings (John Agar) to celebrate her 21st birthday and their engagement. Things seem ok at first and Dr. Loomas even informs the couple that Janet has inherited a huge estate. But the big news is she is the daughter of the infamous Dr. Jekyll who became Mr. Hyde and was eventually killed by a mob. Janet refuses to marry Bill but he disagrees. Meanwhile a stupid servant Jacob (John Dierkes) hangs around eavesdropping. Of course Loomas is up to no good and he kind of hypnotizes Janet. At night she has a weird dream and then finds evidence she might have been out roaming. 

After Maggie the maid (Mollie McCard) is found dead Jacob spreads rumors that Janet could be a werewolf. She has another nightmare and wakes up with blood on her hands. "This ridiculous! We're living in the 20th century!” Of course it's Loomas who's the Hyde-wolf and he's hypnotized Janet into thinking she's the killer. George has encounter with Loomas and gets clouted but wakes in time to prevent Janet from committing suicide. After George and Loomas-Hyde have another tussle, Jacob puts a stake through his heart. But the final scene is a repeat with Hyde saying "Are you sure?". 

This run of the mill typical late '50's low budget horror film was directed by the great Edgar Ulmer who's output for interesting films was reaching it's end. He made only 6 more movies. The story has a few good scenes but basically it's not much. Screenwriter Jack Pollexfen was nearly at the end of his career too.

Star Talbott made THE CYCLOPS for Bert I. Gordon the same year. 

https://moviemeltdown.blogspot.com/2020/11/they-dont-call-him-mr-big-for-nothing.html

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He also had a son!:

https://moviemeltdown.blogspot.com/2020/11/inferior-quasi-sequel.html

The Tingler

 

THE TINGLER-1959-After a pre-credit warning from director William Castle, Dr. Warren Chapin (Vincent Price), a doctor who does autopsies for the state, meets Ollie Higgins (Phillip Coolidge), a theater owner who's brother in law has just been executed. Ollie invites Chapin home for some coffee where the doc meets Ollie's mute wife Martha (Judith Evelyn)) who faints at the sight of blood. When Chapin goes home we learn that he's married to a rich floozy named Isabel (Patrica Cutts) who's sister Lucy (Pamela Lincoln) gets a long very well with her brother in law and is also in love the the doc's young assistant David (Darryl Hickman). After frightening Isabel and taking X-rays of her spine he discovers a creature he dubs “the tingler” that lives on fear and resides in every human! 

To try and understand the power of the tingler, Chapin takes a powerful drug (seems like LSD) and becomes terrified but is saved when he screams which is the only way to immobilize the creature. When Martha dies after seeing some horrifying hallucinations (it seems like Chapin might have given her the drug) Ollie brings her corpse to Chapin who removes her tingler (since she couldn't scream it's still active) and puts it in a cage. It looks kind of like a giant centipede. Isabel tries to use it to kill her husband but Lucy spoils her plans. Chapin decides he's broken the laws of nature and the only way to destroy the tingler is to put it back in Martha's body. It turns out Ollie's not the kindhearted timid henpecked husband he pretends to be....

This classic '50's "gimmick" film directed by the one and only William Castle features one scene in bright color and is still as entertaining as it was when first release (despite a few lapses in reason). Price is great as the very analytical scientist who comes to regret his discovery. On it's initial release certain seats in theaters were wired to give unsuspecting moviegoers a slight "tingle" when the monster appears! 

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They Don't Call Him Mr. Big For Nothing!

 THE CYCLOPS-1957-Susan Winter (Gloria Talbott) is looking for her husband who disappeared in a mysterious valley in Mexico. Along for the ride are the pilot Lee Brand (Tom Drake), bacteriologist Ross Bradford (James Craig) and Marty (Lon Chaney), a grumpy guy looking for uranium. They encounter some giant animals (lizard, hawk, rodent) and the husband now a 25 foot giant (Duncan “Dean” Parkin) with a radiation scarred face and one eye. He traps them in a cave and kills Marty. They make for their airplane while the cyclops is fighting a snake. Bradford throws a flaming spear into its eye and they escape. 

Once again writer-director Bert I. Gordon makes a low budget movie about a gigantic man. Supposedly shot in 5 or 6 days Gordon did his best with what he had. Monster Dean Parkin played the scarred Glen Manning in THE WAR OF THE COLOSSAL BEAST the next year, a sequel to THE AMAZING COLOSSAL MAN (which Mr. B.I.G.made the same year as this; he also made the giant bug movie THE BEGINNING OF THE END in '57). 

Star Gloria Talbot was the lead in DAUGHTER OF DR. JEKYLL the same year as this. Male lead James Craig was once groomed to be Clark Gable's replacement while the star was in the army. Despite having co-starred with Judy Garland in 1944's MEET ME IN ST. LOUIS, Tom Drake film career never took off and he wound up mostly doing TV. Lon Chaney co-starred in the TV series "The Last of The Mohicans" around this time. He had a standout role in THE DEFIANT ONES the next year. 

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Blood Drinking Mummy

 

PHARAOH'S CURSE-1957-In 1910 Cairo British army Sgt. Storm (Mark Dana) leads a small party to an ancient tomb. Along with him is Sylvia Quentin (Diane Brewster) whose husband is at the site. While camping they meet the mysterious Simira (Ziva Rohann; billed here as Ziva Shapir) who wants to guide them so they'll get to the tomb quicker. Suddenly their food and water starts to disappear. When Sylvia is bitten by a scorpion they find their medical kit gone as well but Storm saves her. Meanwhile Sylvia's husband Robert (George N. Niese) decides to open the tomb despite the warnings of his colleague (Ben Wright). They discover a mummy but when Storm gets to the site he and orders the tomb sealed, the mummy has vanished and strange footprints are found. Their guide (Simira's brother) starts to turn into a mummy! He later drains the blood from a donkey. The next day while everyone is exploring, the full fledged mummy kills a soldier and drinks his blood. A dead pharaoh has actually transferred his spirit into the guide and made him a wrinkled up blood drinking mummy. While the main group searches for the tomb their translator (Kurt Katch) is killed. Storm tries to stop the mummy but only gets its arm. Simira scares Sylvia who runs into a cave but she is rescued by a soldier. Quentin is killed in a cave in while following the mummy (who also seems to die). Simira was probably a cat goddess and it's decided the group won't tell the outside world about the discovery. 

Despite it's low budget PHAROAH CURSE has some creepy scenes thanks to director Lee Sholem who'd directed SUPERMAN VS. THE MOLE MEN, TOBOR THE GREAT and a few in the Jungle Jim saga. Like a lot of fast but competent low budget filmmakers he went into TV. 

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Inferior Quasi-Sequel

 

THE SON OF DR. JEKYLL-1951-After the notorious Mr Hyde is killed and changes back to Dr. Jekyll, his baby son Edward is rescued by Dr. Lanyon (Alexander Knox) and adopted by Dr. Utterson (Lester Matthews). Years later Edward (Louis Hayward) is thrown out of college for some of his experiments. When he proposes to his fiance' Lynn (Jody Lawrance) the doctors decide to tell Ed of his heritage. Ed takes up residence in dad's house and is hounded by the newspapers and taunted by locals. Ed concocts his father's formula and against the wishes of his faithful butler Michaels (Rhys Williams) takes it. 

Unbeknownst to him someone has tampered with the brew. He passes out and turns into Hyde Jr. But when he tries to reproduce the results for the press of course it doesn't work. When a young man (Hamilton Camp) is attacked Edward is accused and arrested by Inspector Stoddard (Paul Cavanagh). It seems Ed is being railroaded. He escapes from the sanatorium and does his own investigating. Of course Lanyon is behind the whole thing. Apparently he lost his reputation when he defended Ed's dad and wants revenge by driving Ed crazy. 

Victor Adamson (aka Denver Dixon and father of future exploitation film director Al Adamson) is briefly seen as a coachman.

SON isn't very good. It's talky and predictable. Director Seymour Friedman made entries into series featuring Boston Blackie, The Crime Doctor and The Saint and later went into TV. 

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Dance Vampire Dance

 

THE VAMPIRE AND THE BALLERINA-1960-A vampire terrorizes an Italian countryside. A ballet troupe is rehearsing at the home of a local professor. Two women Francesa (Tina Gloriani) and Luisa (Helene' Remy) and boyfriend Luca (Isarco Ravaioli) wander into an abandoned castle. There they meet the countess Aldo (Maria Luisa Rolando) and the trouble starts! The countess and her servant Herman (Walter Brandi) are actually vampires setting their sights on the women. Herman turns into a wrinkled laughing monster when he needs blood and the troupe do some wild exotic modern ballet dances. The best part is the vampires' destruction.

The screenwriter/director of this black and white Italian production Renato Polselli later made another vampire film THE MONSTER OF THE OPERA.

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Moe and Larry and Curly Joe

 

 HAVE ROCKET WILL, TRAVEL-1959-The Three Stooges (Moe, Larry and Curly Joe) are maintenance men for a NASA like rocket foundation headed by JP Morse (Jerome Cowan). Inga Naarvey (Anna-Lisa) heads the project and admits she's “married to science” when psychologist Ted Benson (Robert Colbert; later in Irwin Allen's "Time Tunnel on TV) suggests marriage. 

When JP tells Inga the foundation might close down the trio (who have taken a liking to Inga and vice versa) decide to make their own rocket fuel. Moe tries to stuff Larry down a sink and they make a general mess of the place (and JP). They hide out in the supposedly abandoned rocket and when it's accidentally launched, they go into space headed for Venus. 

After some hi-jinx with no gravity they land on Venus and encounter a giant spider and then a unicorn whose horn is stuck in a rock. They help him and he takes them to a city. Along the way they sing a song. Later they meet a talking flying electric car and then a weird robot with multiple arms. It shrinks the trio and puts them in a cage. The machine makes robot doubles of them but they botch up everything as well. Somehow the zany three make it back to Earth and are hailed as heroes. At a party in their honor the stooges wind up making all the party goers fight each other. Their doubles show up too!

This was the "new" Three Stooges first feature length film as the team had a resurgence in the late '50's due to their Columbia shorts being shown on TV. It's also Curly Joe DeRita's debut. He replaced jolly Joe Besser who co-starred in the last series of their short comedies. Though this black and white movie was a box office success Moe didn't like it and really it's that good. Later efforts were much funnier. 

Director David Lowell Rich was a busy TV director who later made many TV movies and the blaxploitation film THAT MAN BOLT. 

https://moviemeltdown.blogspot.com/2018/10/bolt.html

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Stan and Ollie

 

A CHUMP AT OXFORD-1939-Stan & Ollie (Laurel & Hardy of course!) fake their way into becoming butler and maid for a wealthy couple (Stan is the maid). After being fired (Stan gets drunk and serves the salad dressed only in his underwear) they get jobs as street sweepers. When they accidentally capture a bank robber (Rex Lease) (because of Stan's discarded banana peel) the bank president sends them to Oxford to get an education. After the students (one is Peter Cushing) play several pranks on the duo, Stan gets hit on the head and becomes Lord Paddington, an ear wiggling pompous powerhouse with an English accent. 

The opening segment involving the team as servants was added by Hal Roach after the production was finished because his distributor United Artists, deemed it too short (around 40 minutes). This had been done deliberately by Roach as he wanted to double the time of two reelers but not make a full length feature. 

Australian born Alfred J. Goulding directed Harold Lloyd comedies in the 1920's and later worked on the ill fated last project by Laurel & Hardy, UTOPIA. 

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More Juveniles

 

BOY SLAVES-1939-Runaway kid Jesse (Roger Daniel) falls in with a gang of homeless juvenile delinquents led by weird looking jerk Tim (James McCallion). After they beat up a rich kid, the sheriff (Arthur Hohl) arrests them but a seemingly honest businessman Albee (Charles Lane) says they can work for him but it's just for illegal child labor. Albee's servant Annie (Annie Shirley) helps them but gets beaten for her trouble. When their plan to mail a letter telling of their plight fails, they rebel, beat up the foreman, start a fire and escape. 

Unfortunately Jesse is shot and killed. The rest and Annie hold up in a cabin. The adults try to use the kids for target practice but some cops arrive to defuse the standoff and Annie convinces them to give up. A judge (Ray Gordon) gives a heartfelt "apology" to the exploited kids and sends Albee to jail. The kids have names like Knuckles, Miser, Pee Wee, Atlas and Pinky and Olin Howlin is a cook. It's the only movie directed by screenwriter PJ Wolfson. 

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Are They?

 

ARE THESE OUR CHILDREN?-1931-An early talky exploitation mortally tale about Eddie (Eric Linden), a too self confident high school student who lives with his grandmother (Beryl Mercer) and younger brother (Billy Butts) and has a nice girlfriend Mary (Rochelle Hudson). But after he's humiliated at school he falls into a life of crime while romancing a floozy (Arline Judge). He shoots and kills his grandma's deli owner friend over a bottle of "hooch". When he and his cronies are arrested Eddie likes the publicity. When his ego driven idea of being his own lawyer backfires he's convicted and sentenced to death. 

Director Wesley Ruggles (brother of actor Charlie) had made made comedy shorts in the silent era. He later directed Mae West in I'M NO ANGEL. 

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Angel Angel

 

ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO-1969-Wacky hippie drug mess about Tara (folksinger Holly Near), the dumpy headcase daughter of decadent gay father (Charles Aidman) and self obsessed ex-porno actress mom (Jennifer Jones) who winds up taking drugs and having sex with weirdo rock star Bogart (Jordan Christopher) and freaky friends Joe (Lou Rawls), Santoro (Roddy McDowall) and Davey Davidson (Anna Livia). Bogart seduces mom and after she dies skydiving he whips dad to death with a chain. 

This movie is not very good and it's a shame to see Academy Award winning actress Jennifer Jones in such a sleazy production, one of the last produced by the legendary Sam Katzman and released through AIP. It's the only directing credit for screenwriter Robert Thom (it's based on an unproduced play he wrote) who was no stranger to off beat films previously writing WILD IN THE STREETS and THE LEGEND OF LYlAH CLARE. He later wrote DEATHRACE 2000 and CRAZY MAMA. Star Christopher had been the lead singer in "The Wild Ones" who after he left the band recorded the original version of "Wild Thing". 

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"Let's pay Mr. Tartu a Visit"

 

DEATH CURSE OF TARTU-1966-In a pre-credit scene Dr. Hunter (exploitation film director Brad Grinter) gets trapped in an underground tomb and is killed by an Indian warrior. After a decrepit hand shows us the credits we are now in the Everglades where Dr. Gunter (Frank Weed) and local yokel Billy (Bill Marcus) argue over ancient spirits. Billy leaves the doc to his exploring. He drinks coffee and digs up an artifact. As soon as he does a dead witch doctor Tartu (it reminded me of The Aztec mummy) awakens in his coffin and turns into a snake. Gunter is crushed to death by a giant python. Enter Ed Tison (Fred Pinero) and his wife Julie (Babette Sherffill) and some of his students. They go looking for Gunter but only find the artifact he dug up. After the students have an impromptu dance party, Tartu (Doug Hobart) rises from its tomb once again. It turns into a shark (?) and kills Tommy and Joanne, two of the students. When all they find is one bloody limb they agree something evil is going on. Johnny sets out alone for help. Tartu turns into a snake again and bites Johnny to death. After the remaining student Cindy has a dream Johnny is dead, the trio go looking for Tartu's tomb. There they find Hunter's corpse. Cindy flees in terror and is killed by an alligator. They try to open Tartu's coffin but instead Tartu rises and turns into a scary native warrior. He beats up Tison and chases Julie through the swamp. Tison recovers from his beating and pursues them. While Julie sinks in quicksand, Tison and Tartu scuffle again. This time the ancient warrior falls into quicksand and Tyson saves his wife. 

Despite its low budget restraints and its barely seen monster TARTU director William Grefe' manages to provide a fairly haunting and claustrophobic atmosphere in this technicolor low budget horror film . Grefe' (STING OF DEATH) went on to make THE DEVIL'S SISTERS (with Pinero and Sherrill), THE NAKED ZOO (with Rita Hayworth) and IMPULSE (with William Shatner).

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Couch Killer

 

THE COUCH-1962-A psychopath Charles (Grant Williams; THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING MAN) under the care of a psychiatrist Dr. Jantz (Onslow Stevens in his last role) murders random victims at 7 pm and tips off the police before hand. He's screwy because he hated his father and made his older sister his mother substitute after mom died. Despite this he somehow romances the shrink's niece Terry (Shirley Knight). He lies to her about most everything and they plan to marry! He makes a fatal mistake though when he decides to kill the doc who doesn't die as planned. Charles disguises himself as a surgeon and wants to sabotage the surgery. Fortunately he cracks up before he can kill the doc who he believes is now his father. Disappointing conclusion but funny final scene. 

Hal Smith and Harold Gould have unbilled roles. Robert Bloch penned this psychological  drama from a story by Blake Edwards. Director Owen Crump didn't make many feature films.

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Slender Man

SLENDER MAN-2018-This is one of the worst movies by far that I've seen that was released in the theaters. I know controversy followed it. The character is not some urban legend or myth. It was an Internet creation. A group of friends investigate the origins of the character and one of them goes missing. In real life two girls in Wisconsin lured a third girl into the woods and stabbed her multiple times to prove Slender Man existed. Fortunately the victim recovered and the would be killers were place in a mental hospital.

The director Sylvain White also THE LOSERS and has worked mostly on TV.

 

https://moviemeltdown.blogspot.com/2012/02/aptly-titled.html

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slender_Man_stabbing

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Who Does Her Hair?

 

THE GORGON-1964-In the small village of Vandorf, there have been several murders in the last 5 years. All the victims have been turned to stone but this is never brought out at the inquests. Prof. Jules Heitz (Michael Goodliffe) who's son has been convicted of the latest murder (and suicide) seeks the help of local professor Manaroff (Peter Cushing) who's assistant Carla Hoffman (Barbara Shelly) suspects something. Heitz thinks it's Magera, one of the Gorgons who can turn people to stone. Heitz himself is turned to stone but not before writing a letter to his son Paul (Richard Pasco). It's obvious Manaroff knows more than he admits. Paul briefly sees the Gorgon's reflection and ages badly. 

Fortunately when things start to get dull Paul's mentor Prof. Karl Meister (Christopher Lee) shows up and gives the local police inspector (Patrick Troughton) a hard time. Meister believes Carla is the killer but Paul of course has fallen in love with her. Meister is right. Carla is the snake haired monster. In the climax the Gorgon is beheaded but there's no happy ending.

Terence Fisher directed this interesting Hammer horror film that's a little thin on story. Still it's always good to see Lee and Cushing together as adversaries. Screenplay by director John Gilling.

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Sgt. Preston

SGT. PRESTON OF THE YUKON-This color series featured the adventures of Sgt. Preston of The North West Mounted Police who patrolled The Yukon in Canada during the gold rush. 78 episodes were produced over 3 seasons. 

Richard Simmons played the by the book but fair Mountie who always got his man usually with a minimum of killing. In all 78 the Sarge was accompanied by his wonder dog Yukon King. In the first season he rode Rex, a wonder horse. In this season there was no snow. Apparently it was the summer months where it was always daylight. The second and third seasons took place entirely in the snow bound winter. No Rex as Preston traveled by sled but Yukon King was there to pull his master's fat out of the fire many times. 

There were some guest stars and some unusual points. One episode "Gold Rush Patrol" (S 3 Ep 16) was co-written by Ron Ormond. Another was written by comic book writer Arnold Drake. Coleman Francis, the director of THE BEAST OF YUCCA FLATS acted in 4 episodes. Other guest stars: Richard Powers (aka Tom Keene), Almira Sessions, I. Standford Jolley (2), Dan Blocker, Frank Scannell, George Cisar, Keene Duncan (3), Don Red Barry, Gene Roth (2), Michael Mark, Iron Eyes Cody, John Hart, Dick Wilson (2), Harry Lauter, Bud Osborne, Fred Graham, Richard Devon, Syd Sayor, Lane Bradford (2), X Brands, Jason Johnson (2), Hank Patterson, Rusty Westcoat, Guy Williams, Jody McCrea, William Fawcett, Glenn Strange, Robert Shayne, Steven Ritch. 

                                            Coleman Francis in disguise!

The show's sponsor for most of its run was Quaker Oats. Preston ended nearly every episode saying : "Well, King this case is closed". Coincidentally Simmons had already played a Mountie in KING OF THE ROYAL MOUNTED (1940) though in an uncredited role.

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Still In Larryland

MISTRESS OF THE APES-1979-Redneck conspiracy theorist Larry Buchanan apparently took a dim view of NYC when he made this cheap laughable film which begins in “a jungle on the Eastern seaboard” where three black druggies (I guess Buchanan must have read all druggies are black) just walk into a hospital to steal drugs. Not content with that they cut the power then interrupt an operation. Two pot smoking cops in the US murder capital (according to this movie it's Central Park) respond and are both shot by one of the thugs. Next day all is forgotten and scientist Susan (Jenny Neuman) is visited by her doctor and a guy named David (Walt Robin) after she loses her baby. They talk about her missing husband Jameson in The Congo. Later she and another egghead Paul (Garth Pillsbury) visit David. They show her some slides from the jungle. He believes the natives there are homo habilis, the missing link. The trio plus David's wife Laura (Barbara Leigh) go off to Nairobi to find Susan's hubby where we learn David is in cahoots with local trader Matthews (Mark Rhudy) who he hired to kill Jameson. 

The foursome with three Nairobi “maidens” as porters walk around aimlessly while being tracked by Matthews and his partner Brady (Stuart Anderson). After an encounter with the “near men”, a near woman is shot and killed by David. That night one of their female porters is killed. After Susan has a nightmare, she and Paul go out alone to explore. David lets the two killers rape Laura. Meanwhile Susan approaches the near men (with terrible makeup) by doing a monkey imitation while some stupid theme song plays. They are basically primitive clowns. It takes 4 or 5 of them to kill one rabbit. Paul and Laura are held captive but they kill one of the killers and escape. They meet up with Susan and Paul gives everyone a useless recap on what's been happening. Susan goes back to the cave peeps and at night encounters a gorilla which one of the cave guys saves her from. This scene is very dark. 

While the boys gather round the fire, Susan bathes topless which arouses at least one of them to go to Susan’s cave and do the nasty. Not a good idea as an angry cave friend beats lover boy to death. Susan leads the near men on a hunt and kill David and the last bad guy. Paul and Laura leave intending on keeping the tribe a secret. Susan stays to be their leader (“They need me”) and presumably their baby making machine. 

This stupid movie is chock full of bad acting, bad dialogue and inept directing. Co-star Leigh was once a girlfriend of Steve McQueen and was the first human version of Vampirella.

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Back In LarryLand

 

GOODBYE NORMA JEAN-1976-Norma Jean Baker (Misty Rowe) lives with her hateful aunt because her mom was sent to a mental hospital. While auntie is out with her pervert boyfriend, Norma Jean slips off to the movies. Later the aunt throws her out and she gets a job in a factory. She dreams of being a movie star but instead gets raped by a cop. She meets a young corporal  and wins the “Miss Wammo Ammo” contest. Soon she's posing for pulp and S & M magazines. “I'm going somewhere” she says. “I’ve got something they want”. She gets a manager and he takes her to a party where she's raped by movie star Randy Palmer (Sal Ponti). 

A producer helps her land a film role at Lion-Rampant pictures where she gives a soliloquy before giving him a blow job. Norma has a dream where her mom talks to her in a mirror in a straitjacket! After she makes a stag film she has to sleep with a lesbian casting director who slaps her and viciously lectures her. Later a Hollywood executive runs her down and she tries to commit suicide. Then somehow she’s taken in by the semi-retired producer Hal James (Preston Hanson) who has her made over. They have sex and he dies. She finally screws the sleaziest producer and gets a big break. 

This sleazy exploitation fake biography by Larry Buchanan is of course based on the life of Marilyn Monroe.

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Ulmer

 

ISLAND OF FORGOTTEN SINS-1943-On a tropical island Marge (Gale Sondergaard) runs the brothel of the title. Her boyfriend Mike Clancy (John Carradine) has a fight with his friend/rival Jack (Frank Fenton) that practically wrecks the club. Then Mike has a plan to hunt for a cargo of sunken gold with Jack's help. Unfortunately for Marge, Olga (Betty Amann), one of her girls shoots and kills a customer. Marge and three of her girls join the guys to get away from the law. They go to an island where Capt. Grogan (Sidney Toler) and his piano playing sidekick Johnny Pacific (Rick Vallin) live with island girl Luana (Veda Ann Borg). They plot to steal the gold after Mike and Jack recover it. Double crosses follow and tropical storm messes up everything. 

Extremely low budget adventure brought up a notch or two by genius director Edgar Ulmer who worked with Carradine a year later on BLUEBEARD. 

By the way, this film has singing in it!

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Allison Hayes

ATTACK OF THE 50 FOOT WOMAN-1958-Wealthy alcoholic Nancy Archer (Allison Hayes), a socialite fresh out of a mental hospital has a close encounter with a giant alien. No one believes her of course. Her husband Harry (William Hudson) carries on with floozy Honey Parker (Yvette Vickers) and is only around for her money and would like to send her back to the hospital and take possession of her famous “Star of India” necklace. Later Nancy and Harry go out into the desert and at first find nothing. Nancy is ready to commit herself until the UFO shows up and a rubbery giant alien hand terrorizes her. Harry hops in the car and abandons her! The sheriff (George Douglas) and his stupid deputy (Frank Chase) investigate and arrest Harry when he and Honey try to skip town. Nancy is found on  the roof of the bath house exonerating Harry. 

Later on Nancy grows to an enormous size and two doctors Cushing (Roy Gordon) and Loeb (Otto Waldis) think it's due to radiation. The sheriff finds huge footprints in the garden and he and Jess, Nancy's faithful butler (Ken Terrell) follow them. The duo find the spacecraft, enter it and find a collection of jewels including Nancy's “Star of India”. They are chased away by the same giant giant Nancy encountered and he wrecks their car and flies away in his ship. Eventually Nancy breaks free and combs the town for hubby yelling “Harry! Harry!” She finds and kills him just before being electrocuted herself. 

Although this a fun low budget Sci-Fi movie it's really hampered by terrible SFX. Director Nathan Juran didn't like it and is credited as Nathan Hertz (he made THE  7th VOYAGE OF SINBAD the same year). Screenwriter Mark Hanna had written THE AMAZING COLOSSAL MAN for Burt I. Gordon the year before!

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Air Farce

 

THE STARFIGHTERS-1964-In this cold war documentary like yawn inducer, seasoned Air Force major Stevens trains three newbies on refueling planes in the mid-air including Lt. John Witkowski (Robert Dornan), a senator's son. This movie is excruciating in it's boredom. The lead actor later became a controversial racist senator. Director Will Zens made a handful of other movies like CAPTURE THAT CAPSULE and HOT SUMMER IN BAREFOOT COUNTY. Even MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000's version couldn't save this thing!

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Nazi Manhunt

 

OPERATION EICHMANN-1961-Nazi Adolf Eichmann (Werner Klemperer) is in charge of the “ Final Solution”. His assistant is Hoss (John Banner) who talks about extermination around the dinner table with his wife and children. Eichmann berates the captain of Dachau (Theodore Marcuse) for his killing quota being down. He keeps his wife in Munich while he romances his mistress Anna (Ruta Lee) in Berlin. After orchestrating many atrocities he escapes with Anna. A guy named David (Donald Buka) who'd watched his parents gassed at Auschwitz forms a group that hunts Nazis. They discover Eichmann in Madrid. He flees to Kuwait branded a Jew (a story made up by David's group) but an official (Oscar Beregi) helps him escape. He winds up in Argentina but nobody likes him there. It ends with him captured, being taken back to Israel to stand trial. 

Though obviously produced on a low budget this little docu-drama is very well made by director R.G. Springsteen, who's greatest output was westerns. It's also weird to see Klemperer along side Banner in such serious roles as a few years later they would play comic Nazis in TV's “Hogan's Heroes”. The real Eichmann was executed in 1962.

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“Rotten Stinking Mouthpiece”

 

THE INDESTRUCTIBLE MAN-1956-A police officer Dick Chasen (Casey Adams aka Max Showalter) relates the story of Butcher Benton (Lon Chaney Jr.), a criminal double crossed by his partners and sentenced to death. He's also the only one who knows where the 6 hundred thousand dollar haul is. His lawyer Paul Lowe (Ross Elliot) is behind the whole thing. After vowing revenge, Benton is executed but two scientists (Robert Shayne and Joe Flynn) accidentally bring him back to life. Unable to talk anymore he becomes a mute revenge seeking monster impervious to bullets. He goes after Lowe and his pals Squeamy Ellis (Marvin Press) and Joe Marcellia (Ken Terrell) but first stops off to see his Burlesque dancer girlfriend Eva (Marion Carr). After getting even with most of them Benton meets his demise in a sewer where he's burned to death. 

This fast moving low budget horror crime drama also features intense close ups of Chaney's eyes. Director Jack Pollexfen produced and wrote many low budget features including THE NEANDERTHAL MAN, DAUGHTER OF DR. JEKYLL and THE ATOMIC BRAIN.

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William Whitney

 

THE CAT BURGLAR-1961-Jack Coley (Jack Hogan, later in the TV series “Combat!”) is a cat burglar who steals a suitcase with valuable papers from Nan Baker (June Kenney from EARTH VS. THE SPIDER). She gets help from a wino (Bruno VeSota) and a pawnbroker (Gene Roth) to get it back but an important notebook is missing. Since Jack threw away the plans he tries to forge a new copy. The guys who want the papers Reed (Gregg Palmer) and Leo (Will White) beat Jack up. Nan's boyfriend Alan (John Baer; NIGHT OF THE BLOOD BEAST) is mixed up in a spy ring. Everyone but Nan dies in the final shootout. 

A seldom seen little crime drama directed by veteran William Whitney who was doing lots of TV at this time but also made MASTER OF THE WORLD the same year. Actor Leo Gordon wrote it.

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