Creeps

 

NIGHT OF THE CREEPS-1986-In 1959 some aliens lose a parasite like monster that jumps into the mouth of a college kid as his girlfriend is killed by an ax toting escaped lunatic. In 1986 two dweebs looking for a corpse to fulfill a pledge accidentally release the kid from a cryogenics lab. The parasite jumps into a lab technician and starts to multiple and spread. An asshole police captain Cameron (Tom Atkins), haunted by the ax murder, tries to solve the murders. The creatures reanimate corpses including the ax loony. Dick Miller has one scene as Walter, a cop in charge of weapons. Dead prom guys terrorize their dates. After his friend JC (Steve Marshall) is killed, dweeb Chris (Jason Lively) convinces his prom date Cynthia (Jean Whitlow) and Cameron to destroy the zombies with fire. 

Most of the lead characters have last names of famous horror directors(Romero,Cronenberg,Landis, etc). There's an alternate ending that was used in the theatrical release and sometimes showed up on TV. Fred Dekker directed this gory but fairly entertaining horror movie. He later made MONSTER SQUAD and ROBO-COP 3.

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They Ain't Mr. Ziffel

 

(IMBD)

INVASION OF THE BLOOD FARMERS-1972-A narrator trying to sound like James Mason tells us about the Sangre Druids who went into hiding and 50 years after the death of Christ disappeared. However they are still around occasionally making blood sacrifices. In some quiet burg in upside New York, an old drunk suffers a bloody death. Two scientists, Dr.Anderson (Norman Kelley), an older guy and his young assistant Don (Bruce Detrick) studying the dead guy's blood, find it seems to be multiplying. In a bar some burnout cleaning up the bloody floor says he saw the"demons from hell". Later a guy in overalls with a limp and a cane spies on the two scientists and beats the family dog to death and drinks its blood. Later he's joined by another Mr. Green Jeans type and they kill a newlywed couple. It seems they are part of a druid blood cult and their prissy leader wants to resurrect their dead queen. When Don finds an ancient key one of the idiots dropped, Anderson calls his friend to see if he can identify it. He's very interested especially since he's part of the cult! Then a hooded figure stabs a guy in the eye with a syringe. After much talking and blood work, the cult kidnaps the old scientist and his daughter Jen (Tanna Hunter; also Don's girlfriend who earlier went to pieces over the dead dog).

The climax features a ritual which revives the cult's queen and when Don jumps in to break it up the whole thing resembles a Monty Python skit. The terrible acting and cliched script plus awful night time scenes shot in broad daylight make me feel this could have been an intentional set up, still done ineptly though. Director Ed Adlum (from Queens, NY) co-wrote the screenplay (with Ed Kelleher) while working for Cashbox magazine. A few years later he wrote the even worse SHRIEK OF THE MUTILATED.

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Tne Big House

 

(IMDB)

BIG HOUSE USA-1955-Jerry Barker (Ralph Meeker) botches the kidnapping of the son of a rich guy (Willis Bouchey) when the kid is killed escaping. Ranger Chief Erickson (Roy Roberts) and FBI agent Madden (Reed Hadley) arrest him but can only find him guilty of extortion. The warden (un-billed Stafford Repp) puts him in "the lion's den", a cell with 4 notorious criminals: Machine Gun Mason (William Talman), Benny Kelly (Charles Bronson)), Alamo Smith (Lon Chaney) and Rollo LaMar (Broderick Crawford). Notoriously nicknamed "the Iceman" Barker becomes the most hated prisoner there. However his four cell mates are planning a prison break and LaMar wants Barker to go with them so he can get the un-recovered ransom money. They succeed in escaping but LaMar is too tough for his own good. 

This gritty little prison drama was the second feature directed by Howard Koch. He went on to direct stuff like UNTAMED YOUTH, BOP GIRL GOES CALYPSO and THE GIRL IN BLACK STOCKINGS (all in 1957). He also produced many low to medium budget films including horror films like THE BLACK SLEEP, VOODOO ISLAND, FRANKENSTEIN 1970 and THE PHARAOH'S CURSE. In the 1970's he produced several episodes of “The Annual Academy Awards TV Show”.

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Darro & Moreland

CHASING TROUBLE-1940-Jimmy (Frankie Darro) and Jefferson (Mantan Moreland) deliver flowers for an obviously shady florist. When Jimmy finds out his friend Susie (Marjorie Reynolds; later in THE TIME OF THEIR LIVES with Abbott and Costello) has lost her boyfriend (and job) he decides to find her a new one. He thinks someone named Bill Jones would be perfect. Among other things, Jimmy considers himself a handwriting expert. Saboteur Morgan (Alex Callam) convinces Jimmy he's a G-man and makes Jimmy one too so Jimmy can keep an eye on reporter Pat Callahan (Milburn Stone) who's investigating a murder which Morgan committed. Morgan's assistant is Phillips (Tristram Coffin). Naively Jimmy tries to set Susie up with Morgan. Later Jimmy figures out he's a spy and he and his gang have set a bomb at an airplane factory. Callahan winds up in the hospital but a traffic cop (Joe Devlin) helps him get out. Despite the racial subservient role Jeff is a lot wiser than Jimmy, suspecting trouble and questioning his partner's misguided motives. Director Howard Bretherton made UP IN THE AIR with the Darro-Moreland team (they made 8 together for Monogram Pictures).

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TV Special

 

THE PHIL SILVERS SPECIAL: THE SLOWEST GUN IN THE WEST-1960-A gas station attendant (George Chandler) relates to some tourists how the town they are in, Primrose, Arizona was the toughest town in the west. Billy the Kid Blake (Robert Wilke) Wild Bill Monk (John Diekes), Ike & Jake Dalton (Jack Elam & Karl Lukas), Doc Henley (Mauritz Hugo), Jud McCory (George Keymas), Dick Nolan (Bruce Cabot) and Black Bart (Ted DeCorsia) all hang out in town. Two concerned citizens (Parley Baer & Jack Albertson) try to find a sheriff tough enough to stand up against Nolan. Coming into town, bespectacled and dressed in black, is The Silver Dollar Kid (Phil Silvers). He picks a fight with Black Bart but when it comes to a showdown he faints. It turns out the Kid is "the yellow-est man in the west", a coward who would ruin any famous gunslinger's reputation if they killed him. Kathy (Jean Willes),a saloon worker helps him. Later they make him sheriff because no one wants to kill him. Nolan hires Sam Bass (Lee Van Cleef) to do the killing but the Kid convinces Bass to turn on Nolan and he kills the Clantons (he's killed too). Later they search for Chicken Finsterwall (Jack Benny), a worse coward than the Kid (he shot an 84 year old woman in the back). The kid makes Finsterwall his deputy but they have an argument and decide to have a shootout. Neither of them want to draw first. This is the big gag of the whole show. They stand for years waiting for the other one to draw! Byron Foulger is a hotel clerk. Marion Ross is the kid's almost wife and Kathy (Kathie) Brown is a show girl. This was written by Nat Hiken who also created the TV series “Bilko” in the mid-1950's that Phil Silvers starred in. The prolific Herschel Daugherty directed.

                             

Alita

  (IMDB)

ALITA: BATTLE ANGEL-2019-In the year 2506 after a great war with Mars, a United Republics of Mars scientist (Christopher Waltz) rescues a cyborg girl from a junk pile and calls her Alita (after his dead daughter). She (Rosa Salazar) doesn't remember who she is but has memories of fighting a battle on the moon. Meanwhile the scientist's ex-wife (Jennifer Connelly) runs Motorball, cyborg battle game owned by Vector (Mahershala Ali). A young guy Hugo (Keean Johnson) tries to help Alita regain her memory but he also works for Vector stealing parts from other cyborgs. 

It turns out Alita is an URM “berserker”, the most advanced cyborg ever. There are a lot of fights. She even fights after being chopped up in pieces. The real villain is an immortal called Nova (un-billed Edward Norton) . This movie is not bad but it kind of slows down after Alita fights a bounty hunter Zapan (Ed Skrein) when Hugo is branded a criminal. It retains a lot of anime and manga elements but I don't think it deserves a sequel. It was director Robert Rodriguez's biggest hit although there is some controversy over whether it made money or not.

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Bad Future

 

(IMDB)

THE NEW GLADIATORS-1984-In the future a global TV network creates a violent modern gladiator show to beat the rival networks (one show has a woman getting her throat cut by a pendulum). They recruit prisoners for their "contestants" plus a TV "kill star" Drake (Jared Martin) from a rival show who they frame into joining by killing his wife. The thing is put together by Cortez (Claudio Cassinelli; also in SLAVE OF THE CANNIBAL GOD). When he's told to go to hell, he says "I would if it would raise my ratings". A jerk named Raven (Howard Ross) is head of the training camp Drake is sent to. He is joined by old friend Monk (Donald O'Brien; DR. BUTCHER MD), a freaky guy with fake eyes. Other participants include Abdul (Fred Williamson), Akira (Haruhiko Yamanouchi), the scourge of outer Mongolia and Kirk (Al Cliver; ZOMBIE 2), the Minnesota chainsaw murderer. A woman Sarah (Eleonora Brigliadori) tries to convince Cortez Drake is innocent. She visits Prof. Towman (Cosimo Cineieri) who invented Junior, the computer that controls everything. But before he can really help he's killed. 

This ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK/THE RUNNING MAN influenced violent nearly plot-less story was the 20^th film from director Lucio Fulci (he also co-wrote it).

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